Sunday, June 1, 2008

Random Thoughts

Some random thoughts on pregnancy and stuff...

- It's really nice to not having to worry about looking thin. At least, it's not to not have to suck my gut in or to worry about my stomach sticking out after a big meal. Women are so conscious of that, pretty much from puberty on, so the break in past few months has been really nice. It's also nice to not worry constantly about what I eat. I don't have to feel terribly guilty about splurging a little, particularly at this point, now that I've made it this long without ballooning. The trick will be stopping once it's time to lose the weight!

- I did a little happy dance in the dressing room at Goodwill yesterday when I found a shirt and a pair of capris that fit me (and actually looked good). It's nice to be able to look in the mirror and feel good about what I see, even with this gigantic belly. I never would have thought I'd feel good in anything by this point in the pregnancy.

- I'm getting a lot more comments now from random strangers. No random touchers yet, thank goodness, but a lot of talkers. Lots of "How much longer?" or "What are you having?", mostly in the last couple weeks. I suppose it doesn't bother me too much, but it's weird when random people feel the need to comment. Some people I don't mind getting in conversations with, but there have been one or two where I've kept my responses short and sweet because they just seemed odd or wouldn't shut up. The other day I had a guy who looked a little like Snoop Dogg congratulate me while I was walking through the mall on my way to work (For those of you who don't know, I have to walk through a downtown mall to get from the parking ramp to my building. The mall has gone downhill in recent years, with few tenants and shady patrons, and is slated for demolition soon). He was going down the escalator, I was going up, and I heard this random "Congratulations in advance!" Yeah, a little creepy.

- It's weird to not be able to do simple things anymore, like standing up from sitting on the floor or getting up from the couch. I even had to give a second try to getting up off the toilet once! You'd never think having 10 extra pounds on the front of you would throw off your balance so much, but it does. It's even a struggle to change positions in a chair these days, particularly when I'm sitting at work. When you're used to being pretty mobile and flexible, it's a bit of a switch.

- Another switch is having this belly out in front of me. I always used to be able to sneak through small spaces, and now I can't! My belly runs into a lot of stuff, which I always feel bad about. As small as I am, I tend to underestimate the space I need to get through a small area, like between two cars, or past a person standing near another object. I try different angles, and nothing seems to work! At work we have a bathroom door that has to have a code punched into it to get in, and the doorknob is awkward. It doesn't turn easily (or maybe that's just me, particularly since I'm left-handed and that may not be the best for how the knob has to turn), and at least once every few days I'll go to turn it and I won't quite turn it far enough, and I'll run into the door, belly to knob. Not hard, but I still feel guilty. Thank God for cushy amniotic fluid.

- This week begins my weekly doctor's appointments. I'm not exactly looking forward to once again having to undress for my appointments, but I suppose it will be interesting to get some real information from each appointment, like how big the baby might end up or whether or not I'm dilating. While I'm hoping they might be able to give me an idea of when I might go into labor, I've heard enough stories about people going to the doctor in the afternoon with no sign of labor, and going into labor that night, to know that that's merely wishful thinking. Still, the possibility that I might get some advance warning of dilating will be helpful. Until now appointments were just the basics...urine, weight, blood pressure, baby's heart rate, maybe some measuring, a few basic questions, and that was it. Easy, but not exactly informative most of the time. I guess there are trade-offs either way.

It's hard to believe we're only a month away. We saw Craig's family today, probably for the last time before the baby's born. We'll do the same with my family next week. That's sort of a weird feeling. Actually saying stuff like that was especially odd. Reality is a scary thing...exciting, but scary!

No comments: