Saturday, June 28, 2008

Home at Last

Blame it on sleep deprivation...I had posted an entry a couple days ago but when I logged in today, it wasn't there. Turns out I had inadvertently posted it to Craig's Rattlers' blog because he had been signed in on the computer we were using at the hospital. Ugh. Probably a lot of confused lacrosse fans out there! Now that that's fixed, you get two posts in one day, sort of...

Jacob finally came home yesterday morning. It was the end of a very long week. We got to stay overnight at the hospital again, which gave us our first taste of nearly-24-hour-a-day care, and it was tough. He was up for a couple hours at one point, and nothing was calming him down. Definitely not a lot of sleep.

Once he was home yesterday Craig had to go off to work, so it was just me and Jacob for the day. He took a really long nap in the afternoon, and unfortunately, that happened to be the nap I was running around the house getting things sorted out a bit, instead of taking my nap (which I had tried to do the nap before, which only lasted about an hour). By the evening my nerves were starting to fray a bit, because the house was hot and I was worried about how it was impacting Jacob. His eating pattern has been off a bit, so that was bothering me too. I'm definitely feeling a bit inadequate. I know that's relatively normal for the first couple days home from the hospital, but he IS a week old and I'm feeling much better physically than most new moms when their babies come home...but my lack of baby experience up to this point in my life is making me really nervous. I know babies don't need a lot at this stage, just to be fed, to sleep, to be changed, and to have a little interaction. But it's hard to read him sometimes and I feel like I don't even know the right questions to ask when I have the chance. I just don't want my inexperience and exhaustion to leave him vulnerable to anything.

Anyway, he has now learned how to projectile poop. He did it to me twice in the span of about 12 hours. Really nasty. The first night home was so-so. I agonized over trying to swaddle him because the house was so warm, but it seemed to be ok. He didn't feel too hot, and in fact, he slept well. Almost too well, because I'm feeling like I'm going to have to start waking him up during these long spans of sleep to make sure he's getting fed enough during the day. His odd feeding (shorter feedings...he seems to lose interest after a while, then needs an additional shorter feeding later) continued into this morning, and now I'm waiting for him to wake up to feed again. I got some decent sleep, though not enough (never enough!). Oh, and I suppose I should shower, too, while Craig's still here. Life as a new parent...

Speaking of Craig, today is our 5th wedding anniversary. How time flies! We were listening to the rain pour outside this morning and felt relieved that today wasn't our wedding day! We had a great wedding with a beautiful day...and I can't believe it's been five years. Unfortunately, Craig is off to work in a bit for a Rattlers' home game today. He's got most of the next week off, thankfully, but there are still some work commitments that he needs to attend to. I'll be getting some help from my cousin Lori this afternoon, which will be nice. She's dying to hold Jacob (after him being hooked up for so long at the hospital and not being able to be held by other people), so my arms should be a bit freer this afternoon :) Hopefully I will chill out a bit today (figuratively and literally) and be able to enjoy this experience a little more. He's such an amazing little guy, but the constant demand can make it tough to smell the roses a bit. Have a nice weekend :)

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