I can't even...

I mentioned last month that all of the horrible things that had been going on in the world--namely the Boston Marathon bombings and the fertilizer factory explosion in Texas last month, and the Newtown shooting back in December--really made me appreciate all of our blessings and reminded me not to take any moment for granted.  Yesterday a tornado hit just outside of Oklahoma City.  The storm was particularly devastating because it scored a direct hit on two schools, pretty much completely destroying at least one.  So far they're reporting twenty kids have died. 

Newtown was horrific for so many reasons.  It was such a random, senseless act.  It involved very young children.  It was so incredibly violent.  Those parents sent their kids off to seemingly the safest place for them, and they ended up dead.  Everything about it was simply shocking.  But it was such an isolated, random occurrence.  On one hand the randomness was comforting because you knew that the odds of it happening to you were slim...but on the other hand it was a reminder than random things can happen to anyone at any time.

Yesterday's tornado was equally devastating but yet so different.  I want to say it was more relatable, if nothing else.  While we don't get tornadoes too often around here, it's not impossible.  Having something like that happen around here may be about the same odds as a gunman walking into the specific school that your kids attend, but I'd have to say that because it was a natural disaster, it feels a little more relatable because something else could happen that would involve destruction along those lines--a fire, explosion, or storm.  It just seems more plausible than a gunman, you know?  In addition, the damage there obviously went beyond the bounds of the school--the whole community was destroyed.  It just makes you think about how you'd manage if you were in a situation like that.  I think I'd fail miserably, by the way, but it makes you think long and hard nonetheless.

There are two things about this disaster that keep nagging at me.  First, of course, is that those kids were at school when it happened.  Again, you think of school as a safe place, and those kids ended up crushed under the very building in which they spent their days learning.  As many other people have said, I hope it was quick and painless for them.  To think that your child's last moments were scary and/or painful...ugh.  As a parent it would pain me to know I couldn't be with my child and protect them during the scariest moment of their life.  I also can't imagine the torture of being a parent who had to get to that school to find out the fate of their kids.  I'm sure getting there was nearly impossible due to the damage, and then to get there and see how bad it really was...my heart breaks for those whose kids never emerged.  I think about that a lot, that if something ever happened here, I'm all the way downtown while the kids are up in Greece.  It's a 15-20 minute car ride on a regular day, and I can't imagine how awful it would be if I simply couldn't get there...or how long those 15-20 minutes would feel on a normal day if I had to get there fast for an isolated incident. 

Less than two years ago there was a small fire in the boiler room of the church building where the kids' daycare is housed.  It happened during naptime and Jacob still talks about it.  He doesn't seem particularly traumatized, but that he remembers bothers me a bit.  They basically all had to get up and out immediately, and they did.  The fire didn't do any damage to the daycare (and I think any damage to the church was contained to that room), but upon hearing the story at the end of the day, I was definitely thankful that it was a minor incident and their evacuation plan worked well.  Once in a while you hear about fires or intruders at daycares, and I can only imagine how awful it is for parents to make their way there not knowing the fate of their child.  There are only so many teachers with so many arms and hands, you know?  Heck, I think about my limited arms and hands when I'm home alone with the kids overnight.  When it was just Jacob it seemed manageable, but now with two there's the thought of which one you go to first and how you'd get them both out if you had to. 

The other thing that bothers me is how you function through a disaster like that with kids.  I can only imagine the emotional scars the survivors will carry around from their experience in the school, but I'm sure some of them also no longer have a home to go back to.  Their entire world has been destroyed.  From a parent perspective it has to be so hard to function on a practical level.  How do you make sure your family is fed and clothed?  Where can you go so everyone can try to get some sleep?  Where do you get diapers or formula?  But on an emotional level, I can't even imagine.  Knowing that everything is gone--every keepsake, every picture, every toy--I can't even imagine how you begin to give you or your kids any sense of stability and normalcy after that.  I can only imagine the nightmares and separation anxiety they must deal with, or the cries because beloved toys are gone forever.  It has to be so hard to explain to your child that your home just isn't there anymore.  I just don't know how you ever convince them (and yourself) that things will be okay again. 

I suppose it's that element that I relate to more than anything, because a house fire or some other random event (plenty of houses around here have been hit by vehicles, for example) could leave us in the same situation, minus the community in chaos.  Jacob gets emotional about so many little details, so I can't even imagine how he'd react if his Legos were gone or he didn't have his million stuffed animals to cuddle.  I can't begin to think of how we'd talk him down from that, since our nerves would be frayed as well.  And now with a new baby, I know I would be crazy just trying to make sure we have what we need for him, just to make sure he stays healthy. 

I just feel so badly for everyone that has been affected.  I feel like I can't do much but pray, which doesn't feel like a lot.  It's just so horrible, but hopefully God can work some big miracles for those folks...fast.

Catching Up with Jacob

One month from today, Jacob turns five.  FIVE.  I've been documenting his life for nearly five years, and it absolutely boggles my mind that we've come this far.  Kindergarten seemed a lifetime away when he was a baby, and now it's just a few months away.  He's this big, gangly kid.  He's super skinny, because he's too active to keep any meat on his bones.  Something happened in the six months or so while I was too pregnant to lift him, where he's now suddenly almost impossible for me to carry.  He still loves sports more than anything else, and he's very serious about them...right down to his baseball cleats and soccer shin guards.  His imagination runs wild these days when he's playing with his toys--he loves his Legos, Playmobil guys, and his hockey guys.  He's got a giant independent/defiant streak.  He's always known how he wants things to be and will accept nothing else.  Morning arguments about clothes happen almost daily, mostly because he always wants sports pants or shorts and the available ones never seem to match the shirt featuring the sport he wants.  He's big on drama and asks a million questions.  He suddenly loves to draw and color, and he's pretty good at it, too.  He likes asking how words are spelled, and he often likes to write letters, but he often writes things in a total mirror image.  He can be the sweetest little boy, but he's definitely a handful.  His adorable dimple is still intact, but there are days it boggles my mind to think he's the same tiny baby I held in my arms five years ago.

For all the talk there is about how younger siblings get the shaft as far as documenting their lives via baby book or photos, I'll admit that Jacob has probably gotten the shaft since Carter's arrival.  I look through my photos and feel a little bad because there are not many of him.  Are we going to look back on the first few months of Carter's life and wonder where the heck Jacob was and what he looked like?  Admittedly, it's not all my fault.  Jacob isn't the most accommodating when it comes to picture taking, so often it's not even worth trying because I know he won't sit still or give me a good smile.  I really should spend more time covertly documenting his Lego escapades or taking video when he's outside hitting balls with Daddy, but my hands are often pretty full these days.  When he's occupied I'm either managing Carter or getting done what I can around the house.  Those bottles are not going to wash themselves!  He'd also prefer to be with Daddy most of the time anyway.  I suppose I just end up with less moments to capture for posterity.  The everyday moments don't always jump out at you as special, but now that I'm on kid #2 I'm starting to realize how important it is to document those as well.

In general Jacob just hasn't gotten a lot of attention on the blog since Carter's arrival, again because I don't get a lot of time to spend with him, and when I do there's often some sort of argument or frustrating interaction that goes along with it, which just seems to spoil the mood.  I also don't want to harp on Jacob's frequent inability to listen or cooperate, so I probably don't even vent here as much as I could.  He can be a great kid, which probably makes the frustrating moments that much more frustrating since it doesn't have to be that way. 

But when he's being good, he can be so great.  He's very social and he says the funniest things sometimes.  He's very passionate about things.  And when he plays by himself, he can be so imaginative.  The other day when he was home sick, I was getting dressed and could hear him playing downstairs with his hockey guys.  I decided this was a perfect slice of life to take video of.
 The jury's still out on whether or not he will follow in Daddy's broadcasting footsteps, but tell me this is not awesome...


I need to pay more attention to continuing to showcase Jacob on this blog in addition to his little brother.  Both boys continue to amaze me every day--it's just that Carter is a little more accommodating on the picture front!  I'm glad I have this clip because years from now I will watch it and marvel at the little boy he is now.  Time is going so fast, and it's leaving me in disbelief.  The countdown is on...

Two Special Sundays

Last weekend was Mother's Day weekend.  Obviously my Mother's Day was a little crazy, spent mostly in airports and cars.  Before he left for Championship weekend, Craig left me a beautiful bouquet of flowers...

The boys both made presents for me at day care.  Both had to do with their feet, and I think it's pretty funny looking at them side-by-side...

Obviously Jacob's is on the left and Carter's is on the right.  Jacob's says "Mom".  I love them both, but it's so amazing to have a before-and-after sort of comparison.  How do those tiny feet turn into the giant ones?

Today was Carter's Christening.  It took forever to pick a date because of Craig's schedule, but since he had a Friday morning game this week, it worked to do it this weekend.  Of course, picking the date as late as we did meant that a lot of people already had other plans.  It also meant it was too much of a challenge for my brother, the godfather, to fly in for it.  It's just as well, though, since our church doesn't really involve the godparents aside from letting them stand up front.  The godmother was Craig's brother's wife.  I wish that they were more involved, but it's one of the few flaws our church has, so I guess we can't complain too much.  

Carter was a very good boy for his big day.  He ate right when we got to church, and by the time of the baptism, he was pleasantly awake.  He did fine with the water and babbled a bit near the end of the pastor's prayer while he was holding him.  He did drool some formula-tinged drool on the pastor (oops), but considering Carter can spit up a ton and fart like a grown man, we got off pretty easy.  He slept through the second half of church, and woke up just in time for some pictures.  Here's one with all the grandparents...we have a similar one from Jacob's baptism that's in a frame in his room, so hopefully we can keep a similar one in Carter's room...

He wore the same outfit as Jacob did, and managed to keep it clean the whole day!  The party was at our house, and it was a gorgeous day.  The boys spent most of it outside playing baseball, and I had a decent amount of time to mingle and snack compared to some parties I've thrown.  It wasn't a big group, but it was great to see everyone!

It was a busy day (on top of a busy prep day yesterday), and by the late afternoon, most of us were spent...

Jacob was the exception, of course.  He's feeling better, by the way--the stomach bug is gone and appears to have avoided the rest of us, but he's still sort of hit or miss on the eating thing.  I'm a little worried they're going to lecture us at this doctor's appointment next month because he's so darn skinny.  It's hard to keep weight on when you're always moving!  Carter seemed to get a little cold over the last couple days, with sniffling and sneezing, but he seemed better (and still very happy) today!

Today brought back good memories of Jacob's big day, and it's a sobering reminder how quickly kids grow.  It doesn't seem so long ago that he was the tiny baby in the little blue romper, but here we are, on the verge of sending him off to kindergarten.  Carter's already a far cry from the tiny little thing we brought home.  It's been an exhausting weekends with a busy week in between, but I'm so grateful for the many blessings that made them possible.

Best Baby Ever

I'm totally going to jinx myself writing this post--and in fact, after I pondered writing it today, Carter came down with a cold--but it needs to be said...he is an amazing little baby.  He is so good.  I have probably been taking it for granted, but believe me, I have been enjoying every bit. 

It's hard to remember exactly what we went through with Jacob.  I use the blog as a guide, but I didn't blog every single moment (hard to believe, eh?) so I don't remember exactly how challenging he was at certain times.  But Carter is so good that I can't imagine he could be beat.  I'd love to take credit for it, but I'm sure it's not me.  He's just a good baby. 

Most notably, he goes to sleep so well.  For pretty much his entire life, once he's swaddled and a little drowsy and I lay him in his crib, he goes to sleep...or at worst, makes noise for a little bit and then goes to sleep.  He rarely cries.  I can think of two times when I've had to send Craig in at night to soothe him because I couldn't do it anymore.  Two.  That's nothing.  Whether it's bedtime, a middle of the night feeding, or putting him back down for a little nap in between his morning feeding and when it's time to get ready for daycare, he rarely makes a peep. 

He's been sleeping through the night for weeks.  He's woken up early a couple times, but usually falls back to sleep after a minute or two.  I don't have to manage his naps as much anymore now that he's at daycare, but I'd venture he logs a heck of a lot more long naps than Jacob ever did. 

While he's had fussy periods around dinnertime, he rarely gets too miserable for too long.  Usually when he's crying he's either hungry, tired, or just wants a little attention.  I'm not sure if dirty diapers bother him, but sometimes I think a change distracts him enough to get him off his cranky streak, even if it was caused by something else.  A little rocking and butt-patting usually calm a fussy spell. 

He's smiley and sweet.  He likes a good snuggle and finally learned to enjoy the changing table.  He makes the funniest little noises and is starting to move his arms and legs so much.  He's still not much into playing, but he likes to look around and is getting better at grabbing. 

He gets cranky when he's hungry and can't be calmed until he eats, but beyond that, his moods are pretty easy to manage.  He's a good eater.  He's a favorite at daycare.  I long to get done with work just to have a few hours to snuggle him and kiss his chubby cheeks.  I obviously love Jacob, too, but there is something so special about a baby that doesn't talk back and thinks you're the coolest person ever.  Whereas half of my time with Jacob is spent arguing about one thing or another, my time with Carter is nearly all pure bliss.

I know this phase is probably limited.  Teething, illnesses, and developmental milestones lead to lost sleep, cranky moments, and eventually, disobedience.  But for now, I am so content with my sweet, happy little boy.  I'm so sad he's getting his first cold just in time for his Christening on Sunday, but by this time Jacob had already been sick for a full month and was routinely woken up by coughing fits.  I'm so grateful we haven't had to go through that this time.  Every kid has their own challenges--reflux and the milk sensitivity this time--but I truly can't complain.  Carter has been amazing.  I love him so much and feel so lucky to have him.  I said that I wouldn't even consider having another baby unless this one was an absolute angel.  We're very early into this new baby thing, and there's still pretty much no chance I want to do this again, but I'll tell ya, the kid is making a pretty good case for making himself into a middle child.  Again, probably not happening, but he's about as good of a baby as he could be...and I know we'd never get that lucky again.  I'll just be grateful for what we have and leave well enough alone! 

Anyway, I just wanted to say what a good baby he's been so it's recorded for posterity.  Someday I will either use this as proof that baby behavior is a good indicator of future personality, or I will use it to remind myself that he was once the sweetest baby who brought me such joy.  I pray this trend continues, but I know we'll have our moments like we do with Jacob.  I'll just enjoy this while I can and thank God for his mercy on my already tired self!  We are so blessed.

Three Months!

Hard to believe that three months ago right now I was nearing my last few pushes to bring this little man into the world...

And here we are three months later with this adorable smiley baby!  He was so good at the beginning of this month's photo shoot--big smiles!  His face is so much more expressive this month!  He's been very chatty and is still the darling of the room at daycare.  I can't believe how big he's getting and how much he's changing.  It's all happening so fast!  Hard to believe we've halfway to solid foods and a third of the way to crawling.  He's so sweet, he's a great sleeper, and he is so handsome!  We are so lucky!

In other news, Jacob is still sick.  The strep test came back negative and the doctor said it's a stomach bug.  It seemed to have moved south in his system after throwing up again this morning, and he kept food and water down all day.  Because it had moved south, the doctor said the throwing up should be done.  His energy seemed back and we gave him a bland dinner, but a little beyond the BRAT diet since things had been staying down.  But tonight he woke up puking an hour after he went to bed, so now we're back to square one.  I need to see if they're sending his culture out for the non-rapid test, because I still have a hunch it will come back positive.  The fact that stuff is staying down and then suddenly coming back up after 12 hours (it's happened that way twice now) is so confusing.  I'm very concerned any of the rest of us are going to get it, which would be horrible for Carter regardless, bad for Craig since he needs to go on the road for work, and very bad for me since I'll be alone with the kids for the next couple days and we have the Christening coming up Sunday.  I haven't gotten anything really done yet for it, and I'm definitely worried.  Ugh.

Speaking of which, time to get a couple more things done before bed...and I desperately need sleep.  Maybe I'll get a nap or something tomorrow since I'll be home with the sick little man.  I guess that's a bright side.  Please pray the rest of us get through this unscathed... 

What a Weekend - The Rest of the Story

On the way to the game in the limo, that's when the nerves started setting in.  To be honest, my nerves are far better now than they used to be.  I mean, when you've never won one and you're on the verge, there is nothing you want more.  Now that we've won a couple, I still really want to win, but it's different and for whatever reason the butterflies are not nearly as bad.  I remember the championship game in Phoenix when I was questioning my lunch choice and couldn't even think about food once we were at the game.  This time I downed a piece of pizza, a couple wings, and some chips and salsa in the middle of the game!  Still, I was nervous and eager for the game to start. 

 

I sat in a suite with some of the staff, and this was our view...

The arena was small but fairly new and pretty nice.  No frills, really, but nice enough.  It wasn't very bright, though, and the folks watching back home were complaining on Facebook about how dark it was!  It held about 5,000 people.  The Knighthawks actually had a pretty good contingent considering the circumstances of playing on the other side of the country with a week's notice (and expensive plane tickets).  Some of their fans were local Native Americans there to support the many Natives on the team.  There were quite a few family members and staff, as well, and we were a pretty vocal group.  The Stealth obviously still had the numbers advantage, but I'd have to guess that a lot of the fans there were local lacrosse fans excited to see the NLL Championship game in their town, as opposed to a full throng of die-hards from Everett, where the team is normally based.  They were loud, but they weren't rowdy like you'd expect for the biggest game of the year. 

Early on the game was close, but the Knighthawks scored a number of goals in a row to take a big lead.  By early in the second quarter, things were looking good as the Knighthawks had a 7-3 lead.  But Washington came back and suddenly it was tied.  The Knighthawks had a resurgence by the end of the half, however, and the score was 10-7 at halftime.  Washington scored two goals in the third to make it 10-9, and the Knighthawks couldn't score to save their lives.  After a great first half, I was starting to get nervous that this game might be heading for overtime.  Fortunately, Rochester native Joe Walters scored early in the fourth quarter to break the drought temporarily, but it continued on after that as Washington scored again to bring it within one.  The rest of the quarter was very tight, and as the seconds ticked down, we were all very nervous that one bad bounce could change everything.  The Knighthawks managed to get the ball with less than 30 seconds left, which should have been ideal since the shot clock is 30 seconds long and we should have been able to kill that time off, but things happened and suddenly Washington got one last chance.  That last shot pretty much gave us all a heart attack, but goalie Matt Vinc stopped it and the game was over!  The Knighthawks won 11-10!  They're the first back-to-back champions since Toronto beat us in 2003 when I was still working there.  That was a rough game, but it's hard to believe that we've won three championships since!

Here are a few pictures from the postgame...

The commissioner presenting the Champion's Cup

Local boy and game-winning goal scorer Joe Walters raising the Cup

Posing for the team photo...Craig is on the left

Mike Accursi and his wife and son (another Carter!)...I told his wife that he's not allowed to retire, since he's a lucky charm.  He's been on all three championship teams, as well as another one with Buffalo!

The Dawson brothers--they got traded to the team the day we went to Montreal in December, and turned out to be great additions to the team.  This was their first championship.

And yes, us...

The celebration was pretty low-key--at least the part we were around for.  There were some festivities with the team in the locker room with just the team, but afterward we all just headed to a bar/restaurant across from the hotel.  We ate a lot of fried food, drank some beer, and hung out.  Craig and I left around midnight since I had to be up extra early, so I don't really know if anything too interesting happened afterward.  I do know a couple people had stomach issues on the plane ride home (not my plane), but beyond that I'm not sure how the night went.  I'm hoping to enjoy a little more celebrating at some point when the team comes back to celebrate with the fans here. 

I had to be up before 4am for my trip home.  It was cold and rainy.  I hopped in the car a little after 4am and headed back to Seattle.  Despite the rain and some wet roads, the trip wasn't bad.  I kept myself awake and it was light well before 6am.  The mountains were obscured, unfortunately, but Seattle was nice to drive through.  I rushed through getting gas and dropping off my car, and got to my gate just as the first passengers were boarding.  My flights were both fine.  My connection was in Minneapolis, which was fun since the stores in the airport had a lot of moose, sports stuff, and some Peanuts items, all of which are popular things around our house.  I kept myself occupied with attempts to sleep, composing a blog post, and staring out the window on my second leg.  We had one bit of nasty turbulence, but otherwise the travel was pretty flawless.  It was great to get back and see the kids, and after a little downtime, we headed home.  Both boys slept most of the way and went to bed right when we got home, and Craig got home very late.

I have been exhausted the last two days.  Really exhausted.  I'm not surprised given the missed night of sleep, one short night of sleep, and the time change.  But there's a lot to do now that I'm home so it's hard to get to bed early.  I'm definitely glad I went--the game and the Chihuly stuff were both great--but I'll certainly think twice about doing a crazy trip like that again.  I might still do it, but it's good food for thought.  It's hard to be a responsible adult in a scenario like that (both because of having to pass off the kids and because the recovery is hard), but at the same time, it's fun to run off and do something fun and awesome without having kids to limit your options.  That solo time is pretty rare these days, and the ability to see a lovely part of the world isn't too shabby either.  Still, it's not an easy thing to manage and I know I was lucky in a lot of ways.  For that reason I'll think twice, but it was a very special weekend and I'm glad I got to do it. 

Oh, and we're definitely back to reality here.  Jacob threw up at daycare today, though he's been okay but feeling crappy ever since.  The jury's still out on what's going on.  We also have a busy week of planning for Carter's Christening, all while Craig is off on a roadtrip later in the week.  Never a dull moment here...never!

What a Weekend! - Part 2

As I mentioned, I woke up Saturday feeling great.  The weather outside was cool-ish with hazy sun, and I set my sights on a good run down by the river while Craig was at the morning shoot-around.  Before I got going, I decided to try for a FaceTime session with my parents and the kids.  I couldn't use my cell phone in Canada so I just had to press my luck by initiating a session and hope they happened to be near the iPad when I did it, and fortunately, they were!  We ended up chatting for a good half hour or so.  I showed Jacob the hotel room, got some views of Carter, and heard about how everything was going there.  Technology is great like that!  After that I threw on my workout clothes and headed out to the river walk outside the hotel.

The hotel was right on the Fraser River, and the river walk was perfect for a good run. 

Our hotel...our room was the second from the left on the seventh floor 

There were quite a few people out, even though it was fairly early--a few runners, a few walkers, and a few dog walkers.  The weather was great for running because it wasn't too warm, though by the end of my three miles, the sun was emerging from the haze a bit and it was getting warmer fast.  The run was so nice because it was scenic the whole way.  At one end were countless condos with gorgeous grounds...

...at the other end were some park-like areas, and in the middle was the entertainment area around the hotel.

The World's Tallest Tin Soldier

There were pretty flowers along most of it, as well, and as I ran I decided I needed to come back out later with my camera and take some pictures.  The three miles went pretty quickly (and I love that my Nike+ sensor tracks the distance and time for me--it's so cool!), and Craig came back as I was showering off afterward.  He wanted to take a nap before lunch, so I headed out to do my picture taking.


My walk was lovely, and I had a blast taking pictures of random flowers...

So vivid!

These colors were so pretty!

These were like tiny little pom-poms...about the size of a penny.

The sprinklers were on and the water droplets added something...when I could take a picture without getting the camera wet!

I loved the orange on these.  Not sure the picture does it justice.

Not sure I have ever seen a yellow rhododendron!

Not sure what this is, but it was cool!

I love the perfect center of this flower.

 I decided on that walk that I really liked the vibe of the area.  I loved that it was this little spot of bliss on the edge of a city, close to the grocery store and restaurants (across from the hotel) but still so peaceful since it was on the river.  I saw one couple around my parents' age walking back home with their groceries for the day.  It seemed like a nice existence...live on the river, walk to the grocery store, stay out of the crazy city life but be within a half hour train ride of a major, vibrant city.  Seems pretty nice to me!

Incidentally, in the weeks leading up to this trip I felt like I had lost some of my passion for taking photos like this.  My focus has been trying to capture perfect pictures of Carter, and honestly, it wasn't going well.  I think that got me down a little, but this trip was the perfect opportunity to remember how fun it is to get a great shot.  Chihuly and the flowers were the perfect muses.

After my walk, Craig and I headed out to lunch at the A&W restaurant across the street.  We made a stop at the grocery store for a couple things, and the pharmacy for a couple more, and headed back to the hotel.  Craig had to catch the team bus, and I had to meet up with some other wives, girlfriends, moms, and miscellaneous family members and staff to get ready to carpool to the game.  I was lucky enough to go in a giant SUV limo.  I sat next to the goalie's mom, who was a wreck.  I don't blame her!

Outside the arena, there was a gorgeous view of the mountains...

 
And the wood beams outside the arena were actually structural.  Neat touch.

I'll post about the game and wrap up my thoughts on the trip in my next post...