First and foremost, since I was a slacker and didn't post for a couple days, Happy New Year! I hope everyone had a nice holiday and that you're settling back into work, etc. I've been a little all over the place all morning, though I'm sure the hour-long chat that evolved from my sit-down with my bosses to give them the good news didn't help. All went well, mind you...we just turned into a group of women and chatted about randomness for an hour :) It was fun, but obviously not helpful for getting back in the groove!
Anyway...back to my original topic...I'm sure I still have much more growing to do, but I had this realization on Sunday night that in many ways, I've grown up a lot in the past few years.
I went to the Amerks game because I hadn't been to one in a while, and I figured Sunday was a good pick because I didn't have to go to work on Monday. Despite the loss, it was fun...of course word is starting to get around about the pregnancy, so there were congratulations coming from everywhere...even from people who we have no idea how they found out. After the game, we went out for a bit, mostly to grab dinner and keep an eye on the postgame party (Craig's client was the host). We sat with a group of staff, all younger than us but a good group of people. Listening to the talk of partying, getting drunk, doing shots, etc., I started feeling really old. It was funny, because 1) I'm not that far removed from all of that; and 2) Feeling old wasn't a bad thing. I guess pregnancy has a way of making you realize alcohol isn't necessarily the pinnacle of fun. It's fine--I don't look down on anyone for drinking it, but when your entire purpose is to get wasted for no particular reason, that's where I start getting lost. Outside of a couple isolated experiences, I've never been like that. But for some reason the insanity of it hit me even more that night.
Later on, a few of the hockey players came over to say hi. The ones that knew our news congratulated us as well (including one that said something to the effect of, "Congratulations! I'd buy you a drink, but, well...you know..."). We sat there for a bit chatting and listening in on conversations the players were having with another part of the group, and I couldn't help but laugh at some of the machismo and flirting that were going on. On the way home I realized a couple things: First, the Amerks are a very young team, practically devoid of married guys, let alone guys with kids. As a result, they probably don't deal with pregnant chicks too often. Even if someone in their family falls into that category, they don't live near home enough to really appreciate it all. Even though I look young, I wondered if they looked at me as "old", or some version of it. Second, I look at these guys as the kids they are...they're in their early 20s (if that), and honestly, they act like it. Nothing wrong with that. But it was quite a switch from even a few years ago where it was sort of cool to have the players come over and chat. Hockey players are interesting personalities, and even though I've been happily married for years, being in the players' presence was always a little extra interesting. But now, these guys barely register on my radar...they're kids!
I don't know if I'm explaining this quite right, but in the end it was just a crazy realization that mentally I've just moved on to another place in life. That's not to say I won't regress once in a while...but so much of who I am now is vastly different from who I was even a few years ago. It was fun while it lasted, but I'm sure I'm heading into another fun phase in life. "Fun" may have a different definition, but as the commercial says, "Having a baby changes everything."