Yesterday I finally got to go out for a decent amount of time, for the first time since Jacob was born. I think I left around 3:30 or 4 and didn't come home until 6:30. Craig got to feed Jacob some of my frozen breastmilk (from the week he was still in the hospital) from a bottle for the first time. It went ok, though he got fussy near the end. He's been doing that breastfeeding lately, too, so I guess it wasn't surprising. But at least he ate out of the bottle...one less thing to worry about when he heads off to daycare two weeks from today (yikes!).
I went to the mall, primarily to make a couple exchanges, shop a little for myself, and do some scouting for future purchases. It was nice to be out without having to worry about Jacob screaming or having to tote his carrier around. That thing is heavy. I felt a little bad that I didn't miss him more, though most of my shopping somehow involved him--either because it was for him or because of him (in the case of the new clothes for me, having to fit my post-baby body). I decided that it was okay that I didn't miss him too much, because we've pretty much spent the last five weeks attached at the hip and I was overdue on "me time".
Shopping for new clothes was a little odd. I will say that with clothes I look pretty good right now, all things considered. I still have a little belly that's tough to hide, though my chest tends to balance that out. Of course, the chest also tends to make me look a little bigger overall, but there isn't much I can do about that. The belly, however, I really need to get rid of. What few clothes I have that do work with my chest tend to show my belly a little too much. I'm not saying I need to look like I did before I got pregnant, but the jelly belly just hangs there and I don't like looking at it. It's too reminiscent of those gross, wrinkly, hanging skin pouches some women get...it's not like that, but the way it just hangs there reminds me of it. I'm definitely looking forward to getting back in the gym with a goal. I may just get one or two opportunities a week to work out, but I want to make them count. Anyway, the shopping wasn't awful but I'm definitely dressing a different body right now. I was a little baffled by empire-waisted shirts...too maternity-ish, or a style I should just embrace now that I've spent months getting used to it? There are way too many tops out there that are supposed to camouflage a bigger belly that just made me look bigger. Half the shopping trip was like an episode of "What Not to Wear", because I kept looking at stuff that I might have worn before and thought of Stacy and Clinton standing there saying, "You're a mom now. You don't have to look old but you shouldn't look like you're trying to be a teenager." I still need a new bathing suit (my bikini days are over, at least until I figure out if I can get rid of the belly and until my linea nigra (the skin pigmented line a lot of pregnant women get) fades away), and that was a bit of an adventure, hoping my boobs didn't leak while I was trying a suit on. In the end, I did get a couple things, but I'm hoping that my return to the gym will do me some good! Maybe I'll even lose weight out of my chest...isn't that where most women lose it first?
Today I'm hoping to start laundering all of my maternity clothes and start putting them away. I also need to figure out that pesky breast pump that I bought on Saturday. It's my key to freedom! We'll see if Jacob cooperates :)