Belly Watch

I have never been one of those people whose chest gets talked to more than their face. Not that my chest isn't perfectly acceptable, but I guess it doesn't really draw attention to itself. Or at least, I've never noticed that it has. Considering how many men I used to work around at my old job, I'm not sure if I should be thankful, insulted, or worried that I'm really unobservant. In any event, the only reason I bring this up is because I'm increasingly noticing people staring at my midsection. Once they see my face enough to notice who I am, I've seen so many people's eyes dart down to my stomach to provide themselves with a progress report on my belly. It gets even better when they share that report with me ("Oooh, it's getting bigger!" "Ummm, yeah...") Just what every woman wants to hear...that their stomach is getting bigger. Pregnant or not, it still doesn't sound good to hear. It's sort of like picking on your sibling. If you do it, it's ok. If someone else does, not so ok.

Sadly, I know I've probably done that to so many pregnant women over the years. It's natural, so I really can't blame anyone. The belly is the only outward way you know someone is pregnant, and when you haven't seen them in a while, it's your only way to monitor their progress without having to directly ask about it. Working with almost all women probably makes this issue that much more obvious, because women are just more into pregnancy than men...so when every person I pass in the hall is a woman, most likely more people are looking at my belly than would in your average office.

Like I said, I can't really blame anyone for doing it, so don't worry about that if you catch yourself doing it. It's not so much that it bothers me, specifically. It just throws me off a bit. Again, I've never really caught many people giving me a once over or talking to a body part that wasn't my face, so for people to instantly check out my stomach region (an area that, let's face it, is not the favorite body part of most women) is just weird for me.

I also had my first near-touch today. Fortunately it wasn't by some random person (I might freak out on those people a bit), but still, despite the fact it sometimes seems like I have a little alien growing in there, it's still my stomach...and really, no one has touched that in a while other than Craig and maybe a doctor or two.

I know it's something every pregnant woman has to deal with at some point, and I'm sure I'll deal, too. It's just an odd experience when your stomach finally becomes its own little freak show.

FINALLY...

So, finally, as promised, pictures! Please excuse the lack of makeup and the generally exhausted look on my face...I was really tired when we took these, after 3 hours of travel to and from Buffalo and a long night celebrating Mardi Gras at Craig's mom's fundraiser. Great time, but 12:30 is WAY past my bedtime these days. But I wanted to get a picture of day 1 in maternity clothes, just so I could post it here for posterity.

So what's with the two pictures? Well...the "Before" picture is probably closer to the truth most of the time. You can't see much hidden under that shirt, though, so I decided to enhance the view a bit. Amazing how much the stomach muscles allow me to push out these days! I don't look like the "After" normally, though...but closer to it when I've just eaten a lot or really have to pee, or just don't feel like putting forth an effort to keep anything sucked in. Tough habit to break, by the way.

But if nothing else it's a little peek into the future for all of you, in case I don't get around to posting more photos in the near future. Enjoy... :)

Wow...

Just a quickie today because I don't really have anything to talk about and I may have pictures to post later anyway. But I just read on one of the baby websites that at 19 weeks, where I am now, the baby's foot is about an inch long. That's pretty crazy to think about. It definitely gives you quite the mental picture, doesn't it? Although it seems a little big to me (the baby's barely a half a pound right now), it's still something to think about. Pretty cool.

Life without zippers

As I mentioned yesterday, today I decided to jump head first into my pool of maternity clothes. If I am not completely exhausted and desheveled by the end of the night tonight, maybe I'll try to snap a picture or two to post, just to comemmorate this momentous occasion. Anyway...I couldn't stay awake long enough last night (recurring problem lately) to do a test run, so I had to try it out this morning. My black maternity pants are a little long and still a little big in the waist, but otherwise they're not bad. I may hem them up a little bit when I have a chance, but I can wear them with really tall shoes. I just don't want to risk dragging them, though...these have to last through months of frequent wear. They actually made me feel thinner than my regular pants because their lack of buttons, zippers, or fasteners of any kind make them less bulky around the waist. With my normal pants that bulk happens to fall right where I'm fattest right now, so that was a bit of an issue. The maternity pants are pretty comfy, and it was almost this pleasant surprise to go to the bathroom today and realize I just had to pull them down...no hooks or zippers or buttons to worry about. That was pretty cool, and I will enjoy it the next few months, but elastic waists are not something I want to let myself get used to.

My shirt, however, doesn't really make me feel thinner. It's not a maternity shirt, because I'm still not big enough for the ones I have. Real maternity shirts just sort of hang there, and without a belly to really prop them up, they're just long. So for now I'm stuck with non-maternity shirts that aren't fitted. I'm wearing one of my new ones today, one of the clearance purchases from the Macy's juniors department. Not bad, though I've always felt that shirts like this make it look like you're hiding something...namely a big belly (pregnant or otherwise) underneath. Now, if you're carrying a few extra pounds, shirts like this are better than something skin tight that shows off every roll, but I don't think they really fool anyone. So now I've got a complex about wearing shirts like this...either that a) people are going to think I'm overweight and I'm trying to hide it; or b) that everyone's now looking at me going, "Aha! She's finally made the switch over to maternity!" because this is the first time I've worn anything like this so far. Of course, I'll most likely walk in tomorrow wearing my normal clothes again, but then they'll be focused on my stomach because it MUST be bigger if I was wearing maternity clothes the previous day. Of course, now that I know how comfy maternity pants can be, I might want to wear them more...but then I have to get more long shirts because I don't own much that's long enough to cover the belly panel. Doh!

I know, I'm way overthinking this whole thing. Hardly anyone in the office sees me all day, anyway. Oh well. At least I can pretend I'm sitting here in pajama pants or something...that alone makes for a good day :)

Recovering from the weekend...

Well, it's Monday...again. I actually had a pretty high quality weekend, all things considered. Craig was off on both Saturday and Sunday, which is a rarity. That won't happen again until the second weekend in March. And after that it won't happen again until May. So, you can imagine how fun that March weekend is going to be...fitting in as much as humanly possible. That weekend may be a registry weekend, maybe some painting...who knows what else? That's not to say that there won't be a day or two on weekends here and there, but this time of year I just assume he won't be around so it's a pleasant surprise when he is :)

As I mentioned in my last post, Saturday was mostly filled with shopping. While it may not have been particularly fun for Craig, it was nice to just spend time together. We watched a movie (I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry, if you're wondering. Not horrible, but it's nice to know we only spent $1.08 on the rental) and that was pretty much the extent of our excitement. Yesterday was all about a good nap and the Superbowl. We had a good time at the party we went to, hosted by a former Amerks co-worker and his wife. We didn't know anyone else there, but the people were all friendly and the food was great. Added bonus was that it was only about 2 minutes from our house. I ate a LOT, but I didn't feel too gross afterward...must be a nice side-effect of the pregnancy.

The belly continues to grow, but it's in hiding again today. No maternity clothes...just loose pants and a sweater that doesn't completely conform to my shape. Tomorrow I'll probably pull out the maternity clothes for the first time, just because we're off to Buffalo in the evening for Craig's mom's annual Mardi Gras fundraiser. That whole side of the family is probably getting fewer updates on this whole process (I don't know if Craig has ever forwarded this link along), so I figure I'll give them all a little bit of excitement and actually look pregnant tomorrow. Of course, I may give it a test run tonight and freak out, so no guarantees.

As far as the belly itself goes, it's not totally freaking me out yet. I sort of like that it's there (for obvious reasons), but when I really sit back and realize that my body will never be what it was, that's a bit depressing. Before it really started to grow I could think about whether or not I'd ever get back to that size, and if I did, it would be fine. Now I'm at a point where I know I'm not skinny anymore (I still look fine, I know) and if I never again get thinner than I am right now, I'll actually be pretty bummed. I'd have to get all new clothes, if nothing else, and I'm just lumpy, which would not be a good long-term look. I'll obviously do my best once this is all over to get back to my old self, but I know my body still has changes to go through that I haven't even fathomed. That is scary, but I'm trying not to think about that too much. Still, it's tough to wave goodbye to the best body you ever had. But who knows? Maybe my new one will fit in clothes better. Never hurts to think positively, right?

Mini-Celebration :)

Today I made it my mission to find some maternity pants. Most of my pants are slowly but surely getting too tight. Each week when I wear them, they get progressively tighter, and eventually they're just downright uncomfortable to wear all day while sitting at my desk. And it only gets worse after I eat or when my bladder is full. So, with a couple pairs of fat pants left, plus a couple more that must have started out relatively loose, my supply of comfortable work attire has been waning. And I haven't figured out panty hose yet, so even elastic-waisted skirts are a tough one right now.

So, off to the east side of Rochester to hit up one of a couple Old Navys that carry maternity wear. Quick side rant--I've heard from a co-worker that also works at Old Navy that they're phasing that part out of their stores, taking it online only. Maybe it's just her store, but can I just say how cruel that is? As if it isn't tough enough to buy maternity clothes when you're dressing a body you don't have yet...let alone having to buy a bunch of stuff online without being able to try it on first. Even if they make returns easy, it's still a pain. Anyway...I found an awesome pair of jeans! Believe it or not, they're low-rise! They still have a bit of a panel, but that's mostly for stretchiness...it sits below the belly button, and the rest of the jeans look totally normal. Pretty close to my usual jeans, actually. That was a huge find. I can only run around with my jeans unbuttoned for so long. I also bought a pair of khaki pants for work. I don't absolutely love them, but they were cheap and they look ok, so they will work. When you're facing the dilemma of iffy pants vs. no pants, it's not a tough call.

Then we went to Target, and I found the first pair of maternity pants I tried on, the ones I loved that made me confident maternity clothes wouldn't be a nightmare, on clearance!! That was exciting. Always nice to get something 50% off.

That said, I'm really looking forward to warmer weather. It's way easier to dress in warm weather. Baby-doll shirts look way cuter with short sleeves and there's really not much out there with long sleeves to begin with, cute or not. Maternity stuff just looks happier when you don't have to be bundled up. That's still a long way away, so I'll have to make do with what I have, but as much as I don't want to rush this whole process, it's just one more thing to look forward to.

Have a great weekend and enjoy the Superbowl :)

Cautiously optimistic...

So I think I've finally crossed over to the point where I know it's the baby moving and not just a gas bubble. I've been feeling the same sort of stuff for a few weeks, but for all I know some of it was real movement and some of it was indeed gas. Believe me, the body does weird things during pregnancy, so gas manifests itself in different ways than usual. Anyway...today I felt it a lot, and I've been feeling it more and more the past few days. As a result, I'm getting more confident that it's actually the baby. With my belly being "out there" more and more, I figured it would come soon. Of course, I could be totally wrong, but I hope not. It's definitely a weird feeling, but it's pretty stinkin' cool. Who knows how long it will be before it's visible or able to be felt from the outside, though. In any event, I thought that was pretty cool so I figured I'd share.

By the way, this icy, crappy weather is really annoying...and even moreso when you're pregnant and deathly afraid of slipping and falling or having even the slightest fender-bender. It was fascinating to watch out the window from the 16th floor today, but geez...not so much fun when you know you'll have to go out in it. But have a safe weekend, everyone!