Ahhh, my photo scanning project, round 2. As you may recall, back in the fall I scanned all of my film photos, including a bunch of random shots that came from my grandparents' house when it got cleared out after my grandma passed away. Pretty much all of those photos had something to do with me--either I was in them or they were taken from my perspective. It was an educational experience, for sure. Seeing my awkward kid-to-teenage self with grown-up eyes and looking back on all of the things I have done (even at a time where I'm discouraged by what I haven't) was really interesting.
Over Christmas I let the idea to start doing my parents' pictures marinate a bit. I mean, we're talking about 30+ years of photos prior to them switching to digital, and I knew there was a sizable stack of albums in their closet. But mine went more quickly than I expected, and honestly, the thought of anything ever happening to those photos--my main link to my childhood--was enough to push me forward. So, when I was home for my uncle's funeral in January, I took home the first eight albums. Each album had hundreds of photos. Thankfully my mom was pretty well-organized, as it wasn't like I was rummaging through boxes or piecing things together, but it was still quite an undertaking. I finished up all but one album before Carter and I visited a few weeks ago, and I exchanged the finished ones for a new stack. This one had another eight albums, I think, covering the early 90s through around 2002. Apparently after that my parents switched to digital, though I'm not sure where all of 2003 (the year I got married) ended up, as the folders on their computer don't show much from that time. I'm currently somewhere after my freshman year of college. We've entered into my parents' travel phase, and my brother had moved off on his own by that point, too, so as a whole the pictures from here on out will be more about my parents and less about the rest of us. Not quite as entertaining, perhaps, but still good stuff in the long run. But since I've made it through the majority of the stuff including me, I feel like I'm ready to reflect on the experience.
When I scanned my own photos and the old family ones that involved me, they made me reflect more on myself. This set has been firmly entrenched in family--my immediate family and my extended family. From little kid pictures of my oldest cousins to now-passed aunts and uncles back when they were new parents, each album brought so many smiles and a few brokenhearted moments, too. Life goes on, as they say. Sure, there are still moments where I've been able to look at myself a bit more, but mostly its within a context of my place within my family. The journey has been very interesting, especially since I haven't looked at most of these in years (or in the case of the most recent photos, maybe ever?), and perspective definitely changes by the time you're pushing 40 with two kids of your own! Here a just a few things that have made an impression:
1) Much like I found with my own photos, the photo taking was less frequent and probably not as great as hoped. From large gaps in time (summer to Halloween was a frequent one early on) to a mere handful of pictures from significant events (and blurry ones at that), it sort of bummed me out yet again that we were all afraid to use too much film or didn't realize at the time that those moments were fleeting and needed to be captured. My parents took barely a dozen pictures on their first trip to Vegas somewhere in the early 70s, though they had over 20 pictures of their adventures autograph seeking from the Buffalo Sabres in their early fandom days. I think my baby pictures didn't start until I was two days old, and there were definitely fewer than I took of my kids! There were certain milestones I was surprised weren't documented, like my departure for week-long sleepaway camp or a Ford Museum visit on a trip to Detroit when I was around 13. I think I was also expecting something from a play we did for Mother's Day in first grade, but perhaps my mom didn't know what she was coming for! Even the transition from our old house to our new one was pretty uneventful. I'm sure they didn't realize it then, but it's interesting to see now.
2) Last summer at Jacob's birthday party, you may recall I was insistent on taking a picture of all of the cousins together.
It was literally the first time all of the boys' cousins were in the same place at the same time, and it instantly reminded me of all of the pictures I have from my birthdays over the years (up through 13--once we were confirmed the parties were more just grandparents and godparents) with every cousin in attendance gathered around the birthday cake. I had to have one of those for the next generation.
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| The first one... |
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| ...and the last one. |
Similarly, the torture I put my kids through each Christmas with having to sit on the stairs has been validated each time I come across another year of stair pictures at my parents'.
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| The first one... |
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| The last one...at least before John missed one. There may have been more but I haven't gotten there yet! |
3) Seeing everyone so young and full of life has been interesting. Young parents, fresh-faced brides and grooms, sweet babies...and knowing where some of those stories go has been hard. I think some of it is the "This Is Us" effect. Seeing the past while knowing the future is conflicting...but like I said previously, there are reasons God doesn't tell us everything ahead of time. Seeing my last two uncles who passed away look so young and fun, or my other aunt and uncle who were the first and second of that generation to pass, back when they were new parents...or seeing my cousin Kristi as a new baby, knowing that she only had 27 years on this earth, or even my cousin Lisa from the point of view of knowing that she'd one day lose her 13-year-old son (who would have turned 14 this week). All of it hurts. But those were good moments at the time and I guess it's wonderful that those moments existed in the first place, regardless of what happened later. Watching my parents go from practically kids to new parents to around my current age and beyond has been a journey, too, as it's clear how quickly time passes. Perhaps the hardest moment for me was coming across the photos of my Uncle Cliff and Aunt Lynne's 40th birthday party, which I still remember. As you may recall, we celebrated their 70th birthdays last year, and a year later my uncle was gone. When I realized that only 31 years separated those moments--well within my lifetime--and I'm hitting that same milestone myself in less than six months, it stopped me in my tracks. That time period from then to now went pretty fast, and knowing I could be at the end of my life in that same short span of time was sobering.
4) I miss my grandparents and everything they represent. One grandma's cluttered kitchen. The other's old house. Crazy Christmases with family all around. In the early pictures they were younger than my parents are now. Later it was weird getting through a set of pictures and knowing that somewhere in the middle of them, my grandfather passed away. I guess that one can go in the "lack of documentation" category, too, though obviously I wouldn't have expected to see that one. But seeing them all through baptisms and birthdays and anniversaries brought back so many memories and made me wish I was around for so many others.
5) Random revelations:
a) My dad could take a selfie before it was a thing...
b) Artistic shots were few and far between, but I loved this one...
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| That's my brother with a kite |
c) Everyone eventually gains weight.
d) Our trip to Washington DC was busier and even more epic than I remembered (and I thought it was cool already).
e) I'm extra jealous of the support my parents had that enabled them to go on as many trips and weekend getaways as they did!
One other thing I'm discovering as I get deeper into the photos is that there are probably a bunch I haven't even seen, since I was less likely to look at photo albums as I got older. The ones from my college years are probably full of things I never knew existed, which is sort of exciting! I'm most grateful, though, that this is allowing me to save all of these memories forever. I've always feared something happening to these photos, my main link to my childhood. I have plenty of real memories, of course, but these solidify them and also give me the points of reference that I crave. Now that I'm doing this, a significant portion of my past is on my computer and uploaded to the internet for extra safety. There is so much peace of mind in that. I'm so grateful for this opportunity--including the reminder to ask questions about the pictures while I still can. Nothing on earth is more special than family, and I've been blessed with a good one. Now I have the photo proof.
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