I'm writing this during the Super Bowl, since it's been one of the few times this week that it's been perfectly acceptable to sit and do nothing, where I have actually felt like doing anything. I've been sick most of the week, this time with another cold. Carter and I both have had it, and it's basically the second cold in a few weeks for us, although since we've both followed the same path, perhaps it's some sort of twisted virus that came, never entirely went away, and then rebloomed into something even worse. The first one seemed short and was generally minimally annoying--only a few cruddy days followed by feeling fine despite a handful of productive nose blowings per day. This has been worse. It seemed manageable initially, but then Carter had a fever on Wednesday and stayed home from school, and by the time I came home for a shift with him that afternoon, I was relieved to be home since mine was getting worse. When I woke up on Thursday, I could tell I was extra tired despite sleeping okay, and when Carter still had a 99 fever, I figured I'd just stay home and keep him with me. Thank goodness I did, because I napped on the couch (in between Carter interruptions) all morning and only woke up at 12:30 realizing I had to make lunch. I almost had a low blood sugar moment at that point, but luckily righted myself soon enough. Even still, I was pretty beat and having chills and sweats without a fever. The rest seemed to do me good, however, because I definitely perked up a bit by later in the day. And good thing, since Craig was going on the road for 24 hours.
Friday morning I had to get the boys up early since I was solo, and we had a very tight timeline for getting Jacob to school and driving back to Greece so I could get Carter on the bus. Otherwise we'd have a long wait before I could drop him off at school. Five minutes after we left home, Jacob freaked out because he forgot his phone. He had a few reasons to want it, including one class where it would come in handy, a house competition he wanted to record, and the usual long bus ride home. He had a pretty nasty meltdown, right down to blaming me because I suggested he change out of his Nike hoodie into his school one because it technically wasn't a dress-down day. He dropped his phone to do that and never picked it back up, apparently. I really did not want to get it for him--I couldn't go back immediately because it would destroy my schedule, and the thought of driving back to Irondequoit after the bus did not appeal to me at all. Jacob refused to even get out of the car for a few minutes, until I threatened to take the phone away for an extended period of time. It was not great, especially considering I still wasn't feeling great.
But I had to go home to get Carter on the bus anyway, and I debated in my head the whole drive home. On one hand, you're not supposed to coddle your kid and bring them stuff they forget. I've always said I have no choice but to do his lunch because he has no other option at school, and homework is situation-specific (i.e., how lazy/careless was he, and how important is the assignment?). But for a phone? Ugh. On the other hand, it wasn't convenient but it was doable. There's something to be said for being kind and teaching your child compassion. I could have been a jerk and treated him with the same jerkiness that he treated me with, but in a household where we're trying to teach that you shouldn't do that, and that constantly getting revenge is counterproductive, perhaps I should do better. I knew how badly he wanted it, and I know he didn't have full control over himself. He was nervous about participating in the house competition (he thought he was going to part of a three-point contest, though he ended up in a relay instead), and I just had a feeling it was mostly anxiety and he needed compassion this time. So I grabbed his phone, got Carter on the bus, and drove back to school. I luckily got there quicker than usual, and there was zero traffic on the rest of my way to work, so I felt like that validated my decision. And when Jacob apologized profusely by text later that morning, I knew it was the right choice. Ah, parenting.
We were solo Friday night so we went out to have frozen yogurt for dinner since we had an expiring coupon. We ended up running into the boys' old daycare teacher. I think she left daycare shortly before the massive exodus there, and we hated to see her go at the time even though it was for good reasons. We've followed each other on Instagram for a couple years so she's seen pictures of the boys and I've seen pictures of her sweet daughter, but I guess nearly five years was a bit too much because not even Jacob remembered her. Ugh. But she was thrilled to see them, and it was great seeing her, too.
Saturday was basically all-day basketball. Carter played well in the morning--still no points, but he got honored for his defense postgame. They lost pretty solidly, but the other team had one dominant player, and it didn't help that Carter's team was down three players. Then we moved on to Jacob's games, which were craziness. His coach got kicked out five minutes into the first game, for no reason. The ref misheard one thing he said, and then when the coach complained about a non-call on a double dribble (despite it being very tame), he kicked him out. I've never seen anything quite like that so early in the game. Oh, and for each of those incidents the other team got an automatic two points as they don't shoot for technicals at this age. It was brutal. Luckily, after a bit the boys rallied and they won by a bunch. Game two was odd because it featured two girls--both quite tall and one particularly talented. I can't imagine having my daughter playing against boys at that age, but I do give the girls credit. The one was a bit of a whiner on fouls, however, and Jacob took great joy in aiding her in fouling out when he took a charge from her late in the game. The other probably had half of her team's points. We ended up down by 14 at the half, but made a great comeback and only lost by four. Jacob ended up with six points on the day, with a bunch of steals and solid defense. He was a bit annoyed, though, because the other two coaches were giving him a hard time about shooting. He definitely was off on his outside shots, but he kept trying. In the second game almost everyone had to shoot outside because the opponent had the middle covered, so it was a no-win situation for him. The head coach's wife had been Facetiming him in all game, and after the game he texted us specifically to tell Jacob to keep shooting. I think that gave him some validation, but it's tough to get mixed messages. Always nice when a coach has your back, though. It was a tough loss, but with the way the day went, it felt a lot better than most.
Today has mostly been a lazy day. I haven't felt that great all day again (just tired), and since we didn't get a Super Bowl invite this year, we've just been chilling out. Not a bad thing, honestly. I probably would have forced myself to be up to a party, but I'm glad I didn't have to. I have a busy week or so ahead at work, so I need every bit of healing and energy that I can get.
Otherwise, we're still struggling a bit with the Kobe Bryant accident. As a parent, I'm trying to be grateful for the little things in life, and I know Jacob is still coming to terms with the loss from a basketball perspective. It's such a terrible, senseless loss. Stupid fog.
Carter's birthday is now less than two weeks away. I'm pretty much in shock that he's going to be seven. He doesn't usually seem that old, but it's getting harder to insist he's my baby when I see that number getting higher. I'm currently debating on gifts--he's such a weird kid to buy for because he gravitates to screens so much--and we're planning on having his party on his birthday, but we'll have to wait and see until the day before to see if Jacob's basketball schedule will complicate matters. I guess I should get planning on the cake, eh?
This winter marks the five-year anniversary of my layoff from my last job, and I've been thinking about that a lot lately now that my five-year anniversary at my new job is only a couple months away. It's so hard to believe that much time has passed--from when Carter turned two, from Rochester's coldest February ever, from that huge transition in my life. It's also been four years since Jacob's leg surgery. Time is flying. All of this basketball seems to keep things moving, and I have no doubt this month will be more of the same. Getting through January is always a big step mentally, though.
Well, the Super Bowl is over and while I'm happy with the winner, KC's last minute touchdown cost me $50 in my office's squares. Boo. One of these years, right?
Onward to a new week. Wish us good health, if you could. We will need it!
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