It's a Spring Thing

I knew it would happen.  Even though last spring was incredibly stressful, I knew that when spring rolled around again this year, I'd be looking back at it fondly.  Turns out it's happening a little early.  I think it's a combination of Jacob's school season being done and the weather taking a weirdly warm turn already.  Give me a 70 degree day when it's supposed to be freezing and apparently now that's my body's sign to start thinking about travel season and the adventure it was.  Last Tuesday we had ridiculously warm weather, and boom--the memories of our trips and their spring-like weather came roaring back.  Unsurprisingly, the following couple days when it was cold and snowy it faded again, but this week is going to be warm again so I'm mentally prepared for the feeling to return.

I tend to have an issue in my life where I associate certain stimuli with certain experiences, so I guess now that we're getting close to the time of year where this experience dominated our lives, my brain is transporting me back.  It's like how I spent a few Februaries a number of years back craving time at home and off work because I had both maternity leave and unemployment at the same time of year, two years apart.  It's like we hit February and my body said, "Where's my snuggly-time-at-home-break?"  Or how I've talked about the dark period of November sucking me back into the early days of my first pregnancy.  I guess maybe this is sort of like that, only it's happening early this year because the weather has been acting weirdly spring-like when it's not supposed to, just like it did on our trips and the week after we got home. 

Jacob's school season lasted an extra week last year and immediately after that we started turning our attention to his travel season, which started about three weeks later.  March was filled with a lot of planning and flight booking and conversations about how we were going to manage all the travel.  I was panicked about getting through my busy work season amidst all the time off I would need, and it was so intimidating to think about flights, rental cars, eating out for days on end, and managing all the little details that these trips would involve.  And thankfully, I didn't know quite how challenging they would get once injuries entered the equation and a last-minute 15.5 hour car trip became part of the plan.  It was pure insanity at times, to the point it kept me up at night for a good chunk of March.

But in the end, the experience was memorable.  It wasn't easy, but it had its moments and apparently those are enough to bring along positive associations.  That exclusive time with Jacob was a rarity, so that alone was special.  It gave us a couple early shots of spring, and the adventures ended up being pretty unique.  As much as new things can scare me, getting a change of scenery like that can be so energizing.  I loved seeing a new part of the country, and I loved seeing a couple things I've wanted to see for years but figured I'd never get the chance.  I still love that I can say I've been to Oklahoma of all places, and Missouri, too (twice)!  Craig gets to travel all over the country for work, so I think it's just something he takes for granted (although ironically, this weekend he traveled to Texas for the first time ever, so I think that felt a bit more interesting than usual).  For me, flying or going pretty much anywhere outside of Florida or the Northeast has been super rare in recent years.  Being in an airport all those times in a short period was so foreign to me, but it just made me feel like I was "doing something" for a change.  Sometimes I feel like my life experiences pale in comparison to so many others--heck, I have a ton of friends whose kids are far more cultured and well-traveled than I am.  I sometimes feel a bit stuck in my daily life--work, house chores, kid stuff--and suddenly weeks or months have passed and I haven't done anything memorable.  My life is good, yes, and the mundane stuff is important too, but there's a whole big world out there to see, and sometimes I feel like I'm missing my chance to see it.  So, to just get to a couple new places and manage the process on my own felt significant and gave me a different type of confidence than I get in my daily life.  I feel like on the rare occasion I do fly anywhere, I'm having to re-learn everything every time.  It's usually been so long that it's hard to remember what goes in my carry-on, or what I can take through security, or how to manage at the checkpoint.  Same with adjusting to hotel life or rental cars, or just the quirks of being in a new city.  But for a short period, I got to feel experienced at all of it.  I'm also pretty darn proud of doing that whole eternally long car ride by myself, even if it was over two days.  I know all of this is sort of weird to get excited about, but it really did give me a boost while it lasted.

I also really appreciated the quality moments with Jacob.  There weren't many because his injuries made him pretty miserable and he spent a lot of time harping on my (perceived) ineptness with our travels, but they were there.  It was a good opportunity to just talk to him.  He did put on his music during the last half of the long drive, but we had a lot of in-between conversations and I don't take that for granted during the teenage years.  But there were a few moments that felt like such a victory--managing even a tiny bit of connection and understanding with my difficult child.  The Oral Roberts visit in particular was pretty spectacular for so many reasons, and that bonding time alone may have been worth the whole ridiculous experience.  That and the amazing breakfast we had that morning really stand out.  We decided at the last minute (over said amazing breakfast) to shift from the activities I really wanted to do on the trip, to a crazy college tour day.  We had already seen the University of Oklahoma campus the previous day, which had been another exceptionally cool moment, and then we decided to wing a trip to OSU, Tulsa, and Oral Roberts.  We had some fun conversations comparing and contrasting the campuses and marveling at their fancy Division I facilities.  But little compares to the hour we spent at the Oral Roberts campus, which is part prosperity gospel, part Jetsons.  It was a beautiful but bizarre campus with the gaudy, striking prayer tower in the middle, and we just couldn't get enough.  We smiled and laughed and enjoyed the gorgeous weather.  It was pretty amazing.  It would have been a great parent-child bonding moment for anyone, I think, but for a couple people who rarely get along some days, it felt downright miraculous.

We tend to butt heads a lot, and this trip had no lack of those moments--heck, when we got on the road back to the hotel after that great moment, we argued because I wasn't sure what to do about the toll roads, which meant we had to take an unorthodox way back that took a little longer, and Jacob was annoyed about it.  However, all of that conflict also meant we practice working through some of the challenges together and sometimes it wasn't that bad.  He probably wouldn't admit it, but I have to think there were a couple moments where he was like, "Okay, maybe she knows what she's doing...a little."  Gaining his trust was hard, and I still think he probably took for granted a lot of the things that went smoothly because of all the overthinking I did.  But it still could have been a lot worse, and I think that was a victory itself to keep things tolerable.  Food was admittedly a challenge the whole trip (it took me a long time to willingly eat at Chipotle, Chick-fil-A, Jersey Mike's, or Firehouse Subs again), and I'm still not sure how to make that any easier because we researched and did what we could to plan ahead, and it was still hard.  But the good places we did find, and even our Outback takeout Easter dinner, were bright spots.  

I can't say I want to something like this again because it was really stressful.  I will when called upon, but I can't say I'm in a rush.  We're still hoping to miss at least the first week of the travel season to get him more rest, but if he goes back after that I'm on the hook for a couple long drives--Grand Rapids and northern New Jersey.  I can't say the idea thrills me, but hopefully we can use last year's experience to make it better.  But that's a LOT of driving--especially if the earbuds go in and he tunes out.  And again, those are a couple destinations I will struggle to find "fun" in, I think.  I really like to get bonus experiences out of those trips, but those don't jump out at me as anything too exciting.  The northern part of the Jersey Shore is a half hour away from the NJ location, and Grand Rapids does have a nice-looking botanical garden and sculpture park (with a couple Chihulys, no less), so there's that.  But...not much else.  Not that we have time anyway usually, but I always hope even a couple hours might be doable.  Regardless, Craig should be back on board after that and Carter and I will gladly tag along a couple times, but I am relieved to not have to do what we did last year.  It was expensive, exhausting, and overwhelming.  Still...it was memorable.

I asked Jacob the other night if he had any good or enduring memories from the trips, and he pretty much said getting on the plane...grrrr.  I reminded him we did have one really good plane that he loved, and then I reminded him of Oral Roberts and he admitted that was actually the best memory.  So clearly it didn't mean that much to him (or he's got a heck of a poker face), but I hope he hasn't totally blocked it out because of the injuries because someday I hope he appreciates some of the experience.  But knowing him most of it has been stricken from his memory, much like he denies remembering anything about his lacrosse days.

I had hoped to find a few pictures I never posted last year, but it turns out I documented most of the trips pretty solidly, mostly because there wasn't a lot of photogenic stuff for huge parts of it.  I did find a few, though, especially where I was heavily editing because I took so many pictures at the art museum and bombing memorial.  But just a few hidden snippets...

This was taken on the plane ride from Rochester to Chicago on the second trip.  I loved the ice crystals with the cool sky in the background.

This was one of the many statues on the University of Oklahoma campus.  It was huge, as you can tell by the person walking nearby.

This is another view of the prayer tower at Oral Roberts.  This is a more close-up, underneath view than I shared before.  I think I might make this my phone wallpaper again for Good Friday, since it's the crown of thorns.

This is the fountain on the porch of the giant academic building with a beauty shot of the tower in the background.  I realized that I think the thing in the middle of the fountain was the eternal flame and I must have caught it in a moment of weakness or wind because I know it was lit.

Another view of the fountain, but if you zoom in, you can see the flame bending to the right, so it's possible that's what was happening above but the flame holder itself was blocking the view.  I don't know that I ever properly captured how the fountain matched the pointy end of the building, but it did.  The architecture was pretty stunning on this one.

This is probably one of the coolest moments I have ever captured on video--a water bottle doing a flash freeze--and I almost didn't keep it safe.  I realized as I was pulling photos for this post that this video never got transferred over from my phone to my computer, and therefore never got uploaded to YouTube for safe keeping.  It was never in danger of being actively deleted, but had something happened to my phone in the last 11 months it would have been gone forever.  Anyway, I was alone in our hotel room and grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge.  I set it down on the nightstand and realized it looked like ice...but I was pretty sure it was liquid when I pulled it out.  I remembered seeing that phenomenon before where water that's on the verge of freezing will freeze over when agitated, so I grabbed another bottle from the fridge, got my camera ready, and took this video. 

The water inside indeed did turn into an instant, fine slush.  It wasn't ideal for drinking but melted quickly enough and obviously stayed cold.  It was pretty neat.

I don't know that I mentioned how many beautiful sunsets we had on that trip.  I did post the Easter one--I needed that one that night--but every night was pretty.  This was the view from our first hotel room on the second night of that trip.  

I took so many pictures at the art museum because Jacob was rushing me through and I wanted to be able to zoom in later and appreciate the details.  I still wish I would have taken more.  One of my favorite pieces was this boat.  The colors were amazing.

The walk-through with the glass ceiling, which I have seen a few times now, never gets old.  I could have spent so much time there capturing all of the interesting details.  I wish they would have had the floor pillows like Toronto, because I could have plopped Jacob on one of those and let him rest a few minutes.  I liked the color assortment on this one. 

By the way, have I mentioned that Chihuly is going back to the Biltmore estate?  They're going to have one of these, it appears.  No better excuse to get back there and visit my aunt and uncle again!  I have until next January, so we shall see.  

I've mentioned before that these blanket baskets aren't my favorite, but these colors really were pretty.  As a reminder, all of the colored decoration is glass, not paint.

Just another gratuitous view of the tower, with clearer colors than the original picture I posted. 

This was in the modern art room and I just loved it.  I posted a different angle previously, but this deserves its own pic.

This was my attempt at capturing the optical illusion artwork.  I thought it was different, but video was the only way to begin to do it justice.  Not super effective, but you get the idea.

This was an outside view of the ground level window by the big tower.  If you hadn't walked out from under the canopy to see the giant windows above, you might have had a big surprise upon entering.

This was the outside of one of the gates at the bombing memorial.  It says,

We come here to remember

Those who were killed, those who survived and those changed forever.

May all who leave here know the impact of violence.

May this memorial offer comfort, strength, peace, hope and serenity.

These are different angles than what I had posted previously.  It shows a little more what the area that was once the front side of the building looked like.  This was opposite the memorial chairs and was more of a tiered seating area with what appeared to be a round observation deck.  It had a line on the front above the rock wall thanking the first responders.  That building in the background was damaged anad is now the museum.

This is looking down that same side toward the first gate.  That side felt less stark than the chair side.  We didn't get to explore much over there because Jacob's patience was gone by this point.
  

So, here we are back in March.  No big planning as of now.  Usually we have hotels and all of that to work on by this point, but technically they haven't even had tryouts yet and we haven't heard much beyond dates and cities.  I'll just sit back and enjoy the lull, I guess.  Despite the warm weather ramping up, I'm not at the point of spring yet where I'm desperate to escape.  I think part of that is because the weather has been so mild, and the other part is likely that we technically have our Dominican trip coming up in June.  We're now good to get back before Jacob's birthday and Carter's moving up ceremony, so that's good.  But I'm still nervous and not assuming anything since the last trip like this didn't end up working out.  But I guess the hope of it (as much as I'm trying to ignore it for fear of disappointment) is just enough.  

We also need to plan our family vacation, but that's a whole other issue.  Jacob is, of course, still advocating for Disney even though we had established we were not going there this year.  I would love to do something else--I had talked about the Pacific Northwest to go to Seattle and see my brother's family, or we have talked about a return to Atlanta since Carter was in utero the first time--but Jacob is so against "busy" vacations that I don't know how we'll ever come to a resolution that works for everyone.  I'm not even sure what we could do.  I realized that we haven't really done "normal" vacations in years, and when we did they were pretty low-key.  The kids didn't care where we went for years as long the trips included say, a zoo and a sporting event, so we did Pittsburgh, Syracuse, Erie, and Toronto.  After that we did three years of travel lacrosse so we fit our vacation into those trips by finding things to do nearby or en route, like the Basketball Hall of Fame, Howe Caverns, Lake Placid, Gettysburg, and Philadelphia.  And then the pandemic came and we had a full summer off, then did the Jersey Shore trip, and then two years of Disney.  So we have little in-between, really...either really small or really big.  I don't know what a good in-between one would be, although I suppose Jersey was close.  We had some beach time, had fun on the boardwalk, and did the state fair (which was supposed to be Legoland but I screwed up and got shut out of tickets due to the hurricane messing with our plans)...so it was busy but not crazy.  But even that wasn't Jacob's style so I'm not sure what else to do, and suggestions of other resort-type experiences have been shot down.  I'd like to do some fun things as a family before the kids are grown, but I think Jacob is going to make that difficult.  I half expect we won't come up with anything this year and he'll have to learn that lesson the hard way, but knowing him he still won't care and will insist he'd rather do nothing than get dragged all over a city.  It's sort of paralyzing, actually.  And no, he won't offer up any other acceptable options, so here we sit.  I'd like to decide on something so I can start planning Carter's summer camp schedule, but I guess I'll just have to leave some pockets and hope something fits.

So, this March is shaping up much different than the last one, and April could be following suit.  Last year was definitely interesting, but maybe exchanging "interesting" for "calm" isn't such a bad thing!