Thanks to a snowy, icy storm yesterday we ended up with a last-minute three-day weekend. You'd think that would have taken the edge off and helped me have a more productive, lower-stress weekend, but the jury's still out. I'm going through another drive on the struggle bus right now. These phases seem to crop up every month or two, where I'm just completely overwhelmed by typical everyday stuff. Dumb things like picking dinners, cleaning the house, keeping the kids apart and occupied, or even just getting off the couch some nights to get Carter in bed, can be overwhelming. Usually the feeling just lasts a day or three, at least at its worst. Sometimes I wonder if there's more to it than just being a little extra tired or anxious, but I honestly don't know. Not sure I'm ready to face that down just yet.
Yesterday should have been a nice bonus day, but after a brisk morning shoveling stint, I did a little work and then got sleepy. I tried to rest on the couch but of course the boys had to be crazy, so that really didn't work and only left me agitated. I tried to perk myself up after lunch with limited success, but all I managed was a little more work and finishing off the day with a marathon bag-folding session for a work mailing (I worked a half day, essentially). Then I couldn't figure out what to do for dinner. I felt like the day was a failure because I was exhausted and didn't really make the most of the time with the boys. We didn't even go outside to explore the slightly-iced-over (then buried by snow) landscape. Long story short, it wasn't a great day.
Today was a bit better, mostly because I had enough energy to push through and tackle a task that I was struggling with having it standing between me and next weekend's birthday party--cleaning the kitchen floor. I vacuum it reasonably often (though not enough) and Wet Swiffer it when there are visible stains, but really scrubbing it is a pain and I don't do it often. I knew it had to be done before the party (the Wet Swiffer didn't cut it), but the thought of it was overwhelming--almost to the point that even without specifically pinpointing that as a to-do task yesterday, it was paralyzing me anyway. I had to do it and didn't want it hanging there as an evening task, so it had to happen this weekend. But of course, then I decided that the build-up of dust and crap on the floor behind and next to the fridge were making me crazy. Isn't that always how it happens, though? One task leads to another that leads to another, and so on. It's like the "If You Give a Mouse a Cookie" books. I saw a similar meme yesterday that essentially explains how it usually works for a mom with having one task morph into another over and over, including the end result being that you never actually did the task you originally set out to do. Luckily this one didn't sidetrack me since it was part of the bigger task, but 10 years' worth (or more?) of dust and spilled candy, nuts, and pasta made for quite the cleanup and it probably did tire me out more than I would have liked.
Getting that done was a relief, but I still have a lot to accomplish over the next week--more cleaning, decluttering, last minute vacuuming, food planning, and gift buying. Not to mention that we haven't figured out the cake yet and I also have some Valentine's matters to take care of. I'm going to have to be productive, so hopefully I don't have another mental or physical obstacle to contend with. My latest cold seems to be subsiding. I'm down to a few noseblowings a day, and my cough is much better. Carter seems to have had the same sort of cold and his cough is hanging in there, but he seems mostly better, as well. Everything is going around, though--including this stupid Coronavirus--so nothing ever feels comfortable this time of year. When I see all of the "sick" references in my daily Facebook memories, I know it's common enough this time of year to make things difficult without warning.
Speaking of health, it's hard to believe we're coming up on the anniversary of Carter's tonsil surgery. In case you're wondering, the apnea seems better but I don't think he's sleeping much more soundly--I think he still thrashes a lot and we are still having a night wetting issue, which will be an important thing to bring up with his doctor. It still seems weird to me that it wasn't an issue for at least a year until last fall. Since the surgery didn't fix it, I'm concerned with what's causing it. It didn't seem to be a diabetic issue based on testing done last year, so I guess that's comforting, but it still seems odd to me. At one point it seemed like the strep antibiotics fixed it, but it restarted after the surgery, somewhere around the time the antibiotics finished up, but possibly just before if I recall correctly. It's causing some teasing/confidence issues now so if there's a way to fix it, that would be helpful.
I still have all of the house fixing issues to figure out, and we're having an impossible time picking a time of year to try to go to Disney, so I have all of that stuff still hanging in there, too. You'd think that just getting it all done would ease that part of the stress, but I guess when you're already overwhelmed, it's harder than it seems. This week has enough for itself, as do most. So much to think about...so wish me luck for Sunday.
Saturday, February 8, 2020
Sunday, February 2, 2020
News & Notes, Big Game Edition
I'm writing this during the Super Bowl, since it's been one of the few times this week that it's been perfectly acceptable to sit and do nothing, where I have actually felt like doing anything. I've been sick most of the week, this time with another cold. Carter and I both have had it, and it's basically the second cold in a few weeks for us, although since we've both followed the same path, perhaps it's some sort of twisted virus that came, never entirely went away, and then rebloomed into something even worse. The first one seemed short and was generally minimally annoying--only a few cruddy days followed by feeling fine despite a handful of productive nose blowings per day. This has been worse. It seemed manageable initially, but then Carter had a fever on Wednesday and stayed home from school, and by the time I came home for a shift with him that afternoon, I was relieved to be home since mine was getting worse. When I woke up on Thursday, I could tell I was extra tired despite sleeping okay, and when Carter still had a 99 fever, I figured I'd just stay home and keep him with me. Thank goodness I did, because I napped on the couch (in between Carter interruptions) all morning and only woke up at 12:30 realizing I had to make lunch. I almost had a low blood sugar moment at that point, but luckily righted myself soon enough. Even still, I was pretty beat and having chills and sweats without a fever. The rest seemed to do me good, however, because I definitely perked up a bit by later in the day. And good thing, since Craig was going on the road for 24 hours.
Friday morning I had to get the boys up early since I was solo, and we had a very tight timeline for getting Jacob to school and driving back to Greece so I could get Carter on the bus. Otherwise we'd have a long wait before I could drop him off at school. Five minutes after we left home, Jacob freaked out because he forgot his phone. He had a few reasons to want it, including one class where it would come in handy, a house competition he wanted to record, and the usual long bus ride home. He had a pretty nasty meltdown, right down to blaming me because I suggested he change out of his Nike hoodie into his school one because it technically wasn't a dress-down day. He dropped his phone to do that and never picked it back up, apparently. I really did not want to get it for him--I couldn't go back immediately because it would destroy my schedule, and the thought of driving back to Irondequoit after the bus did not appeal to me at all. Jacob refused to even get out of the car for a few minutes, until I threatened to take the phone away for an extended period of time. It was not great, especially considering I still wasn't feeling great.
But I had to go home to get Carter on the bus anyway, and I debated in my head the whole drive home. On one hand, you're not supposed to coddle your kid and bring them stuff they forget. I've always said I have no choice but to do his lunch because he has no other option at school, and homework is situation-specific (i.e., how lazy/careless was he, and how important is the assignment?). But for a phone? Ugh. On the other hand, it wasn't convenient but it was doable. There's something to be said for being kind and teaching your child compassion. I could have been a jerk and treated him with the same jerkiness that he treated me with, but in a household where we're trying to teach that you shouldn't do that, and that constantly getting revenge is counterproductive, perhaps I should do better. I knew how badly he wanted it, and I know he didn't have full control over himself. He was nervous about participating in the house competition (he thought he was going to part of a three-point contest, though he ended up in a relay instead), and I just had a feeling it was mostly anxiety and he needed compassion this time. So I grabbed his phone, got Carter on the bus, and drove back to school. I luckily got there quicker than usual, and there was zero traffic on the rest of my way to work, so I felt like that validated my decision. And when Jacob apologized profusely by text later that morning, I knew it was the right choice. Ah, parenting.
We were solo Friday night so we went out to have frozen yogurt for dinner since we had an expiring coupon. We ended up running into the boys' old daycare teacher. I think she left daycare shortly before the massive exodus there, and we hated to see her go at the time even though it was for good reasons. We've followed each other on Instagram for a couple years so she's seen pictures of the boys and I've seen pictures of her sweet daughter, but I guess nearly five years was a bit too much because not even Jacob remembered her. Ugh. But she was thrilled to see them, and it was great seeing her, too.
Saturday was basically all-day basketball. Carter played well in the morning--still no points, but he got honored for his defense postgame. They lost pretty solidly, but the other team had one dominant player, and it didn't help that Carter's team was down three players. Then we moved on to Jacob's games, which were craziness. His coach got kicked out five minutes into the first game, for no reason. The ref misheard one thing he said, and then when the coach complained about a non-call on a double dribble (despite it being very tame), he kicked him out. I've never seen anything quite like that so early in the game. Oh, and for each of those incidents the other team got an automatic two points as they don't shoot for technicals at this age. It was brutal. Luckily, after a bit the boys rallied and they won by a bunch. Game two was odd because it featured two girls--both quite tall and one particularly talented. I can't imagine having my daughter playing against boys at that age, but I do give the girls credit. The one was a bit of a whiner on fouls, however, and Jacob took great joy in aiding her in fouling out when he took a charge from her late in the game. The other probably had half of her team's points. We ended up down by 14 at the half, but made a great comeback and only lost by four. Jacob ended up with six points on the day, with a bunch of steals and solid defense. He was a bit annoyed, though, because the other two coaches were giving him a hard time about shooting. He definitely was off on his outside shots, but he kept trying. In the second game almost everyone had to shoot outside because the opponent had the middle covered, so it was a no-win situation for him. The head coach's wife had been Facetiming him in all game, and after the game he texted us specifically to tell Jacob to keep shooting. I think that gave him some validation, but it's tough to get mixed messages. Always nice when a coach has your back, though. It was a tough loss, but with the way the day went, it felt a lot better than most.
Today has mostly been a lazy day. I haven't felt that great all day again (just tired), and since we didn't get a Super Bowl invite this year, we've just been chilling out. Not a bad thing, honestly. I probably would have forced myself to be up to a party, but I'm glad I didn't have to. I have a busy week or so ahead at work, so I need every bit of healing and energy that I can get.
Otherwise, we're still struggling a bit with the Kobe Bryant accident. As a parent, I'm trying to be grateful for the little things in life, and I know Jacob is still coming to terms with the loss from a basketball perspective. It's such a terrible, senseless loss. Stupid fog.
Carter's birthday is now less than two weeks away. I'm pretty much in shock that he's going to be seven. He doesn't usually seem that old, but it's getting harder to insist he's my baby when I see that number getting higher. I'm currently debating on gifts--he's such a weird kid to buy for because he gravitates to screens so much--and we're planning on having his party on his birthday, but we'll have to wait and see until the day before to see if Jacob's basketball schedule will complicate matters. I guess I should get planning on the cake, eh?
This winter marks the five-year anniversary of my layoff from my last job, and I've been thinking about that a lot lately now that my five-year anniversary at my new job is only a couple months away. It's so hard to believe that much time has passed--from when Carter turned two, from Rochester's coldest February ever, from that huge transition in my life. It's also been four years since Jacob's leg surgery. Time is flying. All of this basketball seems to keep things moving, and I have no doubt this month will be more of the same. Getting through January is always a big step mentally, though.
Well, the Super Bowl is over and while I'm happy with the winner, KC's last minute touchdown cost me $50 in my office's squares. Boo. One of these years, right?
Onward to a new week. Wish us good health, if you could. We will need it!
Friday morning I had to get the boys up early since I was solo, and we had a very tight timeline for getting Jacob to school and driving back to Greece so I could get Carter on the bus. Otherwise we'd have a long wait before I could drop him off at school. Five minutes after we left home, Jacob freaked out because he forgot his phone. He had a few reasons to want it, including one class where it would come in handy, a house competition he wanted to record, and the usual long bus ride home. He had a pretty nasty meltdown, right down to blaming me because I suggested he change out of his Nike hoodie into his school one because it technically wasn't a dress-down day. He dropped his phone to do that and never picked it back up, apparently. I really did not want to get it for him--I couldn't go back immediately because it would destroy my schedule, and the thought of driving back to Irondequoit after the bus did not appeal to me at all. Jacob refused to even get out of the car for a few minutes, until I threatened to take the phone away for an extended period of time. It was not great, especially considering I still wasn't feeling great.
But I had to go home to get Carter on the bus anyway, and I debated in my head the whole drive home. On one hand, you're not supposed to coddle your kid and bring them stuff they forget. I've always said I have no choice but to do his lunch because he has no other option at school, and homework is situation-specific (i.e., how lazy/careless was he, and how important is the assignment?). But for a phone? Ugh. On the other hand, it wasn't convenient but it was doable. There's something to be said for being kind and teaching your child compassion. I could have been a jerk and treated him with the same jerkiness that he treated me with, but in a household where we're trying to teach that you shouldn't do that, and that constantly getting revenge is counterproductive, perhaps I should do better. I knew how badly he wanted it, and I know he didn't have full control over himself. He was nervous about participating in the house competition (he thought he was going to part of a three-point contest, though he ended up in a relay instead), and I just had a feeling it was mostly anxiety and he needed compassion this time. So I grabbed his phone, got Carter on the bus, and drove back to school. I luckily got there quicker than usual, and there was zero traffic on the rest of my way to work, so I felt like that validated my decision. And when Jacob apologized profusely by text later that morning, I knew it was the right choice. Ah, parenting.
We were solo Friday night so we went out to have frozen yogurt for dinner since we had an expiring coupon. We ended up running into the boys' old daycare teacher. I think she left daycare shortly before the massive exodus there, and we hated to see her go at the time even though it was for good reasons. We've followed each other on Instagram for a couple years so she's seen pictures of the boys and I've seen pictures of her sweet daughter, but I guess nearly five years was a bit too much because not even Jacob remembered her. Ugh. But she was thrilled to see them, and it was great seeing her, too.
Saturday was basically all-day basketball. Carter played well in the morning--still no points, but he got honored for his defense postgame. They lost pretty solidly, but the other team had one dominant player, and it didn't help that Carter's team was down three players. Then we moved on to Jacob's games, which were craziness. His coach got kicked out five minutes into the first game, for no reason. The ref misheard one thing he said, and then when the coach complained about a non-call on a double dribble (despite it being very tame), he kicked him out. I've never seen anything quite like that so early in the game. Oh, and for each of those incidents the other team got an automatic two points as they don't shoot for technicals at this age. It was brutal. Luckily, after a bit the boys rallied and they won by a bunch. Game two was odd because it featured two girls--both quite tall and one particularly talented. I can't imagine having my daughter playing against boys at that age, but I do give the girls credit. The one was a bit of a whiner on fouls, however, and Jacob took great joy in aiding her in fouling out when he took a charge from her late in the game. The other probably had half of her team's points. We ended up down by 14 at the half, but made a great comeback and only lost by four. Jacob ended up with six points on the day, with a bunch of steals and solid defense. He was a bit annoyed, though, because the other two coaches were giving him a hard time about shooting. He definitely was off on his outside shots, but he kept trying. In the second game almost everyone had to shoot outside because the opponent had the middle covered, so it was a no-win situation for him. The head coach's wife had been Facetiming him in all game, and after the game he texted us specifically to tell Jacob to keep shooting. I think that gave him some validation, but it's tough to get mixed messages. Always nice when a coach has your back, though. It was a tough loss, but with the way the day went, it felt a lot better than most.
Today has mostly been a lazy day. I haven't felt that great all day again (just tired), and since we didn't get a Super Bowl invite this year, we've just been chilling out. Not a bad thing, honestly. I probably would have forced myself to be up to a party, but I'm glad I didn't have to. I have a busy week or so ahead at work, so I need every bit of healing and energy that I can get.
Otherwise, we're still struggling a bit with the Kobe Bryant accident. As a parent, I'm trying to be grateful for the little things in life, and I know Jacob is still coming to terms with the loss from a basketball perspective. It's such a terrible, senseless loss. Stupid fog.
Carter's birthday is now less than two weeks away. I'm pretty much in shock that he's going to be seven. He doesn't usually seem that old, but it's getting harder to insist he's my baby when I see that number getting higher. I'm currently debating on gifts--he's such a weird kid to buy for because he gravitates to screens so much--and we're planning on having his party on his birthday, but we'll have to wait and see until the day before to see if Jacob's basketball schedule will complicate matters. I guess I should get planning on the cake, eh?
This winter marks the five-year anniversary of my layoff from my last job, and I've been thinking about that a lot lately now that my five-year anniversary at my new job is only a couple months away. It's so hard to believe that much time has passed--from when Carter turned two, from Rochester's coldest February ever, from that huge transition in my life. It's also been four years since Jacob's leg surgery. Time is flying. All of this basketball seems to keep things moving, and I have no doubt this month will be more of the same. Getting through January is always a big step mentally, though.
Well, the Super Bowl is over and while I'm happy with the winner, KC's last minute touchdown cost me $50 in my office's squares. Boo. One of these years, right?
Onward to a new week. Wish us good health, if you could. We will need it!
Sunday, January 26, 2020
Back-to-Back-to-Back Basketball
We always look forward to weekends where Craig has off, and we always try to make the most of them. This weekend was no exception. We filled most of it with basketball, partly by our usual schedule and partly by choice!
On Friday night we decided to go check out a University of Rochester game. It's free and we figured it might be interesting to see D-III basketball in action. We actually ended up having a fun time. We laughed as the student section (in the picture below, off to the right) counted down the opponent's shot clock a few seconds ahead of the actual clock, in order to force the opponent to shoot too soon. And it seemed to work! Pretty creative and funny! Then, during halftime, there was a scrimmage featuring a local youth team--a team Jacob played last weekend, in fact! The student section cheered them like crazy! It was so cute to see them make shots and have the whole section going nuts. Of course now I'm trying to figure out how we might get Jacob's team there!
It ended up being a really good game, and it even went to overtime! Luckily UR pulled out a win!
On Saturday it was time for Carter's first-ever basketball game! He's playing Upward this year, the same league Jacob did last year. Of course, with 1st and 2nd graders, it looks a little different, but it was fun to watch nonetheless!
He didn't get any points but he played really good defense. He always had his hands in the air, which he probably learned from Jacob's games where the parents are always telling the kids to get their hands up! His dribbling is pretty low to the ground so we need him to start pounding the ball harder to get it to bounce higher, but he's good at what he does do! He even got his star of the game for his control of the ball!
Unfortunately, despite having a lead most of the game, the last groups on the floor weren't a good matchup so they lost the lead, and then the game, in the last few minutes. But I was so proud of how he played! And despite it not being the highest quality basketball, it was definitely a series of little victories that kept it fun to watch. When it's a challenge just to dribble up the court and get a shot off, it's easy to appreciate when it goes well. I'm excited to see how the rest of the season goes!
In the afternoon we were planning on going to Dave & Buster's for the first time as a family. My first time there was a few weeks ago for a work event, and I still had 400 tickets on my card, and somehow ended up with cards from a couple other people--and one of them had 30-some play credits on it. I didn't want to let that stuff go to waste, and I thought it might be fun to take the kids there once. Of course, once we got back from the basketball game and finished lunch, I started feeling like I was coming down with something. I had a lot of post-nasal drip and a dull headache, so I felt compelled to rest longer than originally planned. We got a late start, but actually ended up spending a solid couple hours there. The kids had a lot of fun picking games, especially some of the new and different ones. We were trying to maximize tickets, though Jacob got to play a few games of non-ticket-earning basketball nonetheless.
The only not-great moment was when Carter had a tantrum after losing to Jacob in air hockey. I told Jacob not to play him, but noooo...he really wanted to. Sigh. Here they are before the fireworks...
It took a bit of doing and a couple rounds of figuring things out, but we finally earned enough tickets to get Carter a couple fun prizes and me the silly one I had been trying to earn at my time there for work. Don't ask me why, but the super soft sloth with a shiny, dark purple face and Velcro hands was calling me :) Carter got a super giant knock-off Slinky and a whoopie cushion. The latter prize was only because I was telling the story of the whoopie cushion my co-worker bought with some of her earnings there, and how we were dying laughing at the fart noises it made. The noises were epic enough that a bunch of 30-40-something women we in hysterics! Of course, Carter somehow managed to pop it after about two minutes in the car (we're guessing he somehow blocked the hole), but we did get some good laughs before that.
We finished up the evening with dinner out at 110 Grill, which has great gluten-free options. Jacob loved his burger, and Carter ate his own weight in food--three chicken strips, an entire pile of fries, two carrot sticks, and a scoop of ice cream, part of which he finished off in his root beer on the way home. Growth spurt, perhaps?
After a good night's sleep and church today, we were off to Jacob's basketball games. Luckily they were right in town for the first time in weeks.
The first game started out close but Jacob's team pulled away pretty quickly. He only ended up with a couple points, but he played really well. They won by about 10, I think. In game two, it became clear pretty quickly that they were going to roll over that team pretty solidly. Figures that we'd be playing the kid of a local news anchor who Craig has known for years, since he used to be a sports reporter covering a lot of Amerks games. His kid was actually pretty good, but we nearly tripled them in points before we eased off a bit and he scored a bunch in the last few minutes. We did lose our one tall player to a sprained ankle, so that was rough, but Jacob scored six points (including a very pretty long shot) and did a great job with passes and rebounds. The shortest kid on the team had an amazing second half, too, and we all loved watching him score repeatedly. He said it was 12 points, but we were all sure it was more! It was great to finally get a couple wins, but the celebration was short-lived. As we caught back up with our news anchor friend postgame, he told us about the death of Kobe Bryant. Kobe died earlier in the day in a helicopter accident in California. Later we found out his daughter was also in the accident, which made it even more tragic. Jacob said the bench found out mid-game, but they were all pretty much in disbelief.
Even though I was never a huge Kobe fan, there's a lot that makes his loss extremely difficult to process. For one, we're the same age. In fact, I didn't know it until today, but he was only eight days older than me. But he came out of high school and into the NBA as a young phenom at the same time I was graduating and going to college. He was a devoted father and a longtime husband. For his wife to lose not only her husband but her child is just devastating. And the thought of what must have been going through his mind as the helicopter went down and he knew he and his daughter were facing death...well, it doesn't get much worse than that. Even non-basketball fans know what he meant to the sport and to the city of Los Angeles, so the impact on basketball fans--particularly those just a little older than Jacob--is even more heartbreaking. He was such an icon and continued to promote the sport (though often now as a basketball dad) once he retired. He's one of the best players ever, whether you're looking at his scoring prowess, his championships won, or almost anything else you can measure. It's shocking and sad to lose someone like that so young, with so much still to offer the world as an NBA alum, husband, father, and friend.
It's been difficult to watch Jacob process this, as in his mind, younger players like that aren't supposed to be gone. He's seen it happen with young rappers he follows, but I suppose athletes seem more invincible. He just can't seem to wrap his brain around it, as he talked about it a lot tonight. With how our family has embraced basketball these last few years, this loss is so much clearer to me than it might have been otherwise. I can see how Jacob feels the cavernous hole this has left in the game and its history. And as a parent, there's no way to look at this situation and not feel a sickening pain for what the family is going through. But for a family that pretty much lives basketball these days, it's so incredibly sad. It's surreal watching the TV coverage tonight, because you never in a million years thought you'd be seeing something like this tonight. The world has practically stopped in its tracks. Networks overhauled their schedules, LED lights around the world have gone purple and gold, and the Grammys (held in the Staples Center that Kobe called home) were pretty much completely overshadowed by the mourning crowd outside the arena. It's unbelievable and tragic and just plain sad.
So, as expected, it really was an all-basketball weekend, from start to finish. The ending was definitely unexpected, but I'm thankful for the positive memories we made this weekend prior to that.
On Friday night we decided to go check out a University of Rochester game. It's free and we figured it might be interesting to see D-III basketball in action. We actually ended up having a fun time. We laughed as the student section (in the picture below, off to the right) counted down the opponent's shot clock a few seconds ahead of the actual clock, in order to force the opponent to shoot too soon. And it seemed to work! Pretty creative and funny! Then, during halftime, there was a scrimmage featuring a local youth team--a team Jacob played last weekend, in fact! The student section cheered them like crazy! It was so cute to see them make shots and have the whole section going nuts. Of course now I'm trying to figure out how we might get Jacob's team there!
It ended up being a really good game, and it even went to overtime! Luckily UR pulled out a win!
On Saturday it was time for Carter's first-ever basketball game! He's playing Upward this year, the same league Jacob did last year. Of course, with 1st and 2nd graders, it looks a little different, but it was fun to watch nonetheless!
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| Carter getting introduced |
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| He never stopped moving his feet! |
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| Waiting for a foul shot |
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| Seriously, always moving! |
He didn't get any points but he played really good defense. He always had his hands in the air, which he probably learned from Jacob's games where the parents are always telling the kids to get their hands up! His dribbling is pretty low to the ground so we need him to start pounding the ball harder to get it to bounce higher, but he's good at what he does do! He even got his star of the game for his control of the ball!
Unfortunately, despite having a lead most of the game, the last groups on the floor weren't a good matchup so they lost the lead, and then the game, in the last few minutes. But I was so proud of how he played! And despite it not being the highest quality basketball, it was definitely a series of little victories that kept it fun to watch. When it's a challenge just to dribble up the court and get a shot off, it's easy to appreciate when it goes well. I'm excited to see how the rest of the season goes!
In the afternoon we were planning on going to Dave & Buster's for the first time as a family. My first time there was a few weeks ago for a work event, and I still had 400 tickets on my card, and somehow ended up with cards from a couple other people--and one of them had 30-some play credits on it. I didn't want to let that stuff go to waste, and I thought it might be fun to take the kids there once. Of course, once we got back from the basketball game and finished lunch, I started feeling like I was coming down with something. I had a lot of post-nasal drip and a dull headache, so I felt compelled to rest longer than originally planned. We got a late start, but actually ended up spending a solid couple hours there. The kids had a lot of fun picking games, especially some of the new and different ones. We were trying to maximize tickets, though Jacob got to play a few games of non-ticket-earning basketball nonetheless.
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| Carter on the football game |
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| Jacob in his favorite spot |
The only not-great moment was when Carter had a tantrum after losing to Jacob in air hockey. I told Jacob not to play him, but noooo...he really wanted to. Sigh. Here they are before the fireworks...
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| Check out the giant Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots in the background! |
It took a bit of doing and a couple rounds of figuring things out, but we finally earned enough tickets to get Carter a couple fun prizes and me the silly one I had been trying to earn at my time there for work. Don't ask me why, but the super soft sloth with a shiny, dark purple face and Velcro hands was calling me :) Carter got a super giant knock-off Slinky and a whoopie cushion. The latter prize was only because I was telling the story of the whoopie cushion my co-worker bought with some of her earnings there, and how we were dying laughing at the fart noises it made. The noises were epic enough that a bunch of 30-40-something women we in hysterics! Of course, Carter somehow managed to pop it after about two minutes in the car (we're guessing he somehow blocked the hole), but we did get some good laughs before that.
We finished up the evening with dinner out at 110 Grill, which has great gluten-free options. Jacob loved his burger, and Carter ate his own weight in food--three chicken strips, an entire pile of fries, two carrot sticks, and a scoop of ice cream, part of which he finished off in his root beer on the way home. Growth spurt, perhaps?
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| Stretching out that full belly! |
After a good night's sleep and church today, we were off to Jacob's basketball games. Luckily they were right in town for the first time in weeks.
The first game started out close but Jacob's team pulled away pretty quickly. He only ended up with a couple points, but he played really well. They won by about 10, I think. In game two, it became clear pretty quickly that they were going to roll over that team pretty solidly. Figures that we'd be playing the kid of a local news anchor who Craig has known for years, since he used to be a sports reporter covering a lot of Amerks games. His kid was actually pretty good, but we nearly tripled them in points before we eased off a bit and he scored a bunch in the last few minutes. We did lose our one tall player to a sprained ankle, so that was rough, but Jacob scored six points (including a very pretty long shot) and did a great job with passes and rebounds. The shortest kid on the team had an amazing second half, too, and we all loved watching him score repeatedly. He said it was 12 points, but we were all sure it was more! It was great to finally get a couple wins, but the celebration was short-lived. As we caught back up with our news anchor friend postgame, he told us about the death of Kobe Bryant. Kobe died earlier in the day in a helicopter accident in California. Later we found out his daughter was also in the accident, which made it even more tragic. Jacob said the bench found out mid-game, but they were all pretty much in disbelief.
Even though I was never a huge Kobe fan, there's a lot that makes his loss extremely difficult to process. For one, we're the same age. In fact, I didn't know it until today, but he was only eight days older than me. But he came out of high school and into the NBA as a young phenom at the same time I was graduating and going to college. He was a devoted father and a longtime husband. For his wife to lose not only her husband but her child is just devastating. And the thought of what must have been going through his mind as the helicopter went down and he knew he and his daughter were facing death...well, it doesn't get much worse than that. Even non-basketball fans know what he meant to the sport and to the city of Los Angeles, so the impact on basketball fans--particularly those just a little older than Jacob--is even more heartbreaking. He was such an icon and continued to promote the sport (though often now as a basketball dad) once he retired. He's one of the best players ever, whether you're looking at his scoring prowess, his championships won, or almost anything else you can measure. It's shocking and sad to lose someone like that so young, with so much still to offer the world as an NBA alum, husband, father, and friend.
It's been difficult to watch Jacob process this, as in his mind, younger players like that aren't supposed to be gone. He's seen it happen with young rappers he follows, but I suppose athletes seem more invincible. He just can't seem to wrap his brain around it, as he talked about it a lot tonight. With how our family has embraced basketball these last few years, this loss is so much clearer to me than it might have been otherwise. I can see how Jacob feels the cavernous hole this has left in the game and its history. And as a parent, there's no way to look at this situation and not feel a sickening pain for what the family is going through. But for a family that pretty much lives basketball these days, it's so incredibly sad. It's surreal watching the TV coverage tonight, because you never in a million years thought you'd be seeing something like this tonight. The world has practically stopped in its tracks. Networks overhauled their schedules, LED lights around the world have gone purple and gold, and the Grammys (held in the Staples Center that Kobe called home) were pretty much completely overshadowed by the mourning crowd outside the arena. It's unbelievable and tragic and just plain sad.
So, as expected, it really was an all-basketball weekend, from start to finish. The ending was definitely unexpected, but I'm thankful for the positive memories we made this weekend prior to that.
Tuesday, January 21, 2020
The Grass Will Be Greener in June
Lately Jacob's been talking a lot about wanting to fast-forward time and skip ahead to spring. Sometimes it's because of school, and sometimes it's just because he wants good weather to play basketball outside whenever he wants. I can't say I blame him most of the time. I'm already pretty sick of the cold and snow (though dare I say I'm currently handling it better than usual--but don't quote me on that in March), I look forward to only packing one lunch for a couple months, and skipping over some very challenging work projects doesn't sound half bad.
But then again, it's a terrible habit to get into, this wishing away of time. As a parent of two growing boys, I know that all too well. It may not feel like it in the middle of a typical work day, but time is flying by. My baby will be seven in less than a month and Jacob is turning into such a big kid right before my eyes every day. I know I've spent a good chunk of their childhoods wishing away time--sometimes entire difficult phases, but most often it's something as simple as wanting to skip over work to get home to them. But then I also wish away the evening amidst sibling battles or the dinner rush to get to bedtime so I can enjoy a little "me time" or downtime with Craig. And before you know it, another week, month, or year has passed and we're that much closer to the end of this phase of our lives. Most days I can't believe I'm over 40 and I'm at ages where I vividly remember my own parents. It's all pretty surreal, but the passing of time is becoming really apparent.
I may have mentioned this here before, but when I was in college, I read a book about Christian dating (either "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" or "True Love Waits"--not sure which) and despite my frustration with the book topic (putting off romantic relationships was tough for my low-self-esteem self when boy attention was already elusive), it had a story that stuck with me. It was about a ball with a string inside, and with each pull of the string, time would fast-forward. The character in the story was constantly pulling the string to get through the boring parts of life, and before he knew it, he was out of string and his life was over. Little did he realize that all of those mundane moments added up to a significant part of his life, even if they weren't particularly exceptional as they were happening. I think we'd all have a tendency to do the same, honestly, and I try to remember that in the boring, difficult moments so I don't wish them away.
Thinking back on my life, I do think my memories validate that phenomenon, that the seemingly insignificant moments are more significant than they seem. I've realized in recent years that the most typical warm-fuzzy memories I have of both my childhood and my time in college tend to be more about those mundane moments. When I look at the typical chaos of my evenings at home now, I oddly long for quiet nights at my parents' house, usually with the kitchen lights low and the dishwasher running, my parents watching TV and reading the paper in the family room, and me finishing up homework in time to join them before a favorite show starts. I'm sure my brother was in the mix somewhere, too, probably blasting music in his room or joining us later for TV. But clearly there were a lot of nights like that--unexceptional but apparently fulfilling enough to be oddly comforting years later. College is much the same, with my recollections being of quiet afternoons and evenings spent studying, me on my bed and Mary on hers, books in hand. There were periodic conversations when we'd come across something particularly bizarre in whatever we were reading, or when we'd had enough and just had to complain as we grabbed a snack. Sometimes we had music playing in the background, or in later years it was usually the TV, often showing afternoon soaps or talk shows, or sitcoms in the evening. I had a lot of other fun memories from college, but those mundane moments often stick out anyway.
It's tough trying to explain to an 11-year-old that normal life is significant and special in its own right. Heck, some days I have a hard time remembering it, despite all of this personally experienced evidence to the contrary. He's just waiting for his life to start, without even realizing how much he's already lived. I know school is boring (so is work), and I know he pretty much lives for basketball and when he can play it next. I didn't have anything quite that all-encompassing back when I was his age so I'm not sure what I lived for, if anything, that made everything else pale in comparison. I did cheerleading and was just wrapping up my stint in acrobatics back then, and I certainly enjoyed both, but not to the degree that he obsesses about basketball. But I'm sure I at least wanted to fast-forward through the awkwardness of braces, bad hair, and questionable clothes. I certainly wanted to speed through my homework and phases of being bullied mercilessly. So, I get it. It probably doesn't help that our home life isn't exactly peaceful, either. Maybe he won't have memories of quiet evenings at home because most of ours include numerous tiffs between the boys that put everyone on edge. I really hope those aren't the moments he takes from his childhood, but I'm not sure how to fix it right now either.
It occurred to me this morning that the desire to wish away time probably indicates some lack of faith that there will be something important or exciting within that time that we'd miss out on. If it seems like most of our days are without any sort of fun or significant action, how much would we actually miss if we skipped some? We're probably all quick to wish away the week to get to the weekend, or wish away months to get to a long-awaited vacation, but given the actual opportunity, how many of us would actually do it, and what might we foolishly miss along the way? It's easy to think that I'd want to skip the rest of winter to get to spring, but then I'd miss Carter's birthday at the very least. I'm sure I'd miss another milestone or two, and probably a lot of little happy moments in between. God forbid, but skipping time could also mean sacrificing final moments with someone who passes away unexpectedly, or missing the last moments of "normalcy" before a death, illness, or significant life change (i.e., like when Jacob was diagnosed with Celiac Disease, or time with my old co-workers before I lost my last job). We'd unknowingly miss those moments, as there's really no way to know what moments might be significant. It often takes hindsight to realize the importance after other things have happened. So we really just need to take each moment as it comes, savor what we can, and try to manage the less exciting or more difficult ones.
This is all hypothetical, of course, as we can't really fast-forward time. But I think we do tend to gloss over the importance of the mundane moments in our normal life, which is probably almost as effective as skipping them altogether. We get lost in the boredom and subconsciously stop being an active participant in our daily lives. I think in most cases we're merely trying to survive and we don't realize what we're witnessing in the moment or what its significance may be later. I'm as guilty of it as anyone, and I'm not sure how to fix it. I try to be mindful, and to remind Jacob to take things day-by-day, but I'm by no means perfect. But at least I'm trying. I may want to fast-forward some days, but most of the time recently I think I'm smart enough to remember the story of the ball and string and try to appreciate what I have. I need to get better at making the most of those days in addition to just appreciating they exist, but I guess it'll always be a process. In the meantime, I'll just keep reminding Jacob to appreciate this time because before he knows it, he'll be a 40-something himself. It won't work, but I'll try. And in the meantime, spring will be here soon enough.
But then again, it's a terrible habit to get into, this wishing away of time. As a parent of two growing boys, I know that all too well. It may not feel like it in the middle of a typical work day, but time is flying by. My baby will be seven in less than a month and Jacob is turning into such a big kid right before my eyes every day. I know I've spent a good chunk of their childhoods wishing away time--sometimes entire difficult phases, but most often it's something as simple as wanting to skip over work to get home to them. But then I also wish away the evening amidst sibling battles or the dinner rush to get to bedtime so I can enjoy a little "me time" or downtime with Craig. And before you know it, another week, month, or year has passed and we're that much closer to the end of this phase of our lives. Most days I can't believe I'm over 40 and I'm at ages where I vividly remember my own parents. It's all pretty surreal, but the passing of time is becoming really apparent.
I may have mentioned this here before, but when I was in college, I read a book about Christian dating (either "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" or "True Love Waits"--not sure which) and despite my frustration with the book topic (putting off romantic relationships was tough for my low-self-esteem self when boy attention was already elusive), it had a story that stuck with me. It was about a ball with a string inside, and with each pull of the string, time would fast-forward. The character in the story was constantly pulling the string to get through the boring parts of life, and before he knew it, he was out of string and his life was over. Little did he realize that all of those mundane moments added up to a significant part of his life, even if they weren't particularly exceptional as they were happening. I think we'd all have a tendency to do the same, honestly, and I try to remember that in the boring, difficult moments so I don't wish them away.
Thinking back on my life, I do think my memories validate that phenomenon, that the seemingly insignificant moments are more significant than they seem. I've realized in recent years that the most typical warm-fuzzy memories I have of both my childhood and my time in college tend to be more about those mundane moments. When I look at the typical chaos of my evenings at home now, I oddly long for quiet nights at my parents' house, usually with the kitchen lights low and the dishwasher running, my parents watching TV and reading the paper in the family room, and me finishing up homework in time to join them before a favorite show starts. I'm sure my brother was in the mix somewhere, too, probably blasting music in his room or joining us later for TV. But clearly there were a lot of nights like that--unexceptional but apparently fulfilling enough to be oddly comforting years later. College is much the same, with my recollections being of quiet afternoons and evenings spent studying, me on my bed and Mary on hers, books in hand. There were periodic conversations when we'd come across something particularly bizarre in whatever we were reading, or when we'd had enough and just had to complain as we grabbed a snack. Sometimes we had music playing in the background, or in later years it was usually the TV, often showing afternoon soaps or talk shows, or sitcoms in the evening. I had a lot of other fun memories from college, but those mundane moments often stick out anyway.
It's tough trying to explain to an 11-year-old that normal life is significant and special in its own right. Heck, some days I have a hard time remembering it, despite all of this personally experienced evidence to the contrary. He's just waiting for his life to start, without even realizing how much he's already lived. I know school is boring (so is work), and I know he pretty much lives for basketball and when he can play it next. I didn't have anything quite that all-encompassing back when I was his age so I'm not sure what I lived for, if anything, that made everything else pale in comparison. I did cheerleading and was just wrapping up my stint in acrobatics back then, and I certainly enjoyed both, but not to the degree that he obsesses about basketball. But I'm sure I at least wanted to fast-forward through the awkwardness of braces, bad hair, and questionable clothes. I certainly wanted to speed through my homework and phases of being bullied mercilessly. So, I get it. It probably doesn't help that our home life isn't exactly peaceful, either. Maybe he won't have memories of quiet evenings at home because most of ours include numerous tiffs between the boys that put everyone on edge. I really hope those aren't the moments he takes from his childhood, but I'm not sure how to fix it right now either.
It occurred to me this morning that the desire to wish away time probably indicates some lack of faith that there will be something important or exciting within that time that we'd miss out on. If it seems like most of our days are without any sort of fun or significant action, how much would we actually miss if we skipped some? We're probably all quick to wish away the week to get to the weekend, or wish away months to get to a long-awaited vacation, but given the actual opportunity, how many of us would actually do it, and what might we foolishly miss along the way? It's easy to think that I'd want to skip the rest of winter to get to spring, but then I'd miss Carter's birthday at the very least. I'm sure I'd miss another milestone or two, and probably a lot of little happy moments in between. God forbid, but skipping time could also mean sacrificing final moments with someone who passes away unexpectedly, or missing the last moments of "normalcy" before a death, illness, or significant life change (i.e., like when Jacob was diagnosed with Celiac Disease, or time with my old co-workers before I lost my last job). We'd unknowingly miss those moments, as there's really no way to know what moments might be significant. It often takes hindsight to realize the importance after other things have happened. So we really just need to take each moment as it comes, savor what we can, and try to manage the less exciting or more difficult ones.
This is all hypothetical, of course, as we can't really fast-forward time. But I think we do tend to gloss over the importance of the mundane moments in our normal life, which is probably almost as effective as skipping them altogether. We get lost in the boredom and subconsciously stop being an active participant in our daily lives. I think in most cases we're merely trying to survive and we don't realize what we're witnessing in the moment or what its significance may be later. I'm as guilty of it as anyone, and I'm not sure how to fix it. I try to be mindful, and to remind Jacob to take things day-by-day, but I'm by no means perfect. But at least I'm trying. I may want to fast-forward some days, but most of the time recently I think I'm smart enough to remember the story of the ball and string and try to appreciate what I have. I need to get better at making the most of those days in addition to just appreciating they exist, but I guess it'll always be a process. In the meantime, I'll just keep reminding Jacob to appreciate this time because before he knows it, he'll be a 40-something himself. It won't work, but I'll try. And in the meantime, spring will be here soon enough.
Monday, January 20, 2020
News and Notes, Out of This World Edition
Another busy weekend is coming to an end, but thank goodness for a bonus day today because I never would have been ready to go back to work today!
On Saturday the boys and I were up pretty early to drive to Buffalo for my cousin's bridal shower at noon. That wouldn't have been a big deal except that Craig was working and it was snowing. A lot. The roads actually ended up being okay for most of the way, just getting a bit messy off the Thruway. The shower was great--what more can you ask for than good family time, catered Olive Garden, and a chocolate fountain? It's amazing to think my youngest cousin is a couple months away from getting married! Thankfully the boys were good for Grandpa, and we had a little time at my parents' after the shower to relax. My mom and I worked on the challenging 2,000-piece puzzle she has been chipping away at, which made my dad marvel since he hasn't completed a piece yet! Even Jacob managed to put together some pieces outside the main puzzle that can be moved in when more of it is together. But just as we were getting in a groove, it started snowing harder, so we got on the road. It was a pretty exhausting drive. I was able to go about 45 mph most of the way, but lane changes were harrowing and it just felt slow. It was about two hours, though that included a short stop, but still considerably longer than the usual 1:20. We finished off the night with a three-person shoveling effort to clear about four inches out of the driveway. It was starting to rain a little (but it would turn back into snow), so I wanted to clear it out before it got any heavier. The boys did a great job!
On Sunday Craig was on the road, and of course Jacob had two basketball games 35 minutes away. At least they weren't at 8am this time. His team once again struggled. One game was at least a little close, but the other was pretty rough. Jacob scored four points in the first game and should have had a fifth except that his foul shot bounced off the rim, supposedly hit a cable above the hoop, and dropped through the net, but didn't count due to the cable interference. I felt like in a game like this, for kids, if it goes in, it should count. It's not his fault it bounced crazy, but even without the cable it most likely would have gone in. But anyway...in game two Jacob got injured early. Someone stuck out their leg on a screen, and when Jacob ran into it, it somehow twisted his leg and pulled something in his hip. He sat out for a while and finally made it back in during the second half. He scored one basket and played well, but he was sore afterward. He seems better today. The rest of Sunday ended up pretty lazy, though it was much needed.
Craig came home around lunch time today, and another lazy afternoon was in order for all. Before he arrived home, Carter finished up his big project from the last week or so. Because I flaked and decided I didn't trust the Five Below rock tumbler that he got for Christmas and didn't want to commit to the lengthy process, I got him a replacement gift that also incorporates the "jewels" he likes so much: a dig kit. It was a giant block that had 15 cool rocks hidden inside it. He started working on it last week, and in the picture below you can see a little patch of bright blue by his hand, which was the first one he found.
Another highlight of the week was Carter's first night of basketball. We now have both boys practicing on Thursdays about an hour apart, so those will be busy nights for the next couple months. Carter did pretty well at his practice. He could use to be a better listener when the coach gives drill instructions, but he scored one nice basket and particularly loved running sprints! His first game is next Saturday, and while it will be a very different version of basketball than we're used to with Jacob, it will be interesting to see how he does.
The highlight of the week was Carter's field trip! A couple weeks ago his teacher sent a message about an upcoming field trip to the planetarium. I got very excited because I have never been to the planetarium. As I recall (and I don't think my childhood mind just made this up), when I was approximately Carter's age or a little younger, my class was supposed to go to the planetarium. I missed it due to illness, though I'm not sure if it was a normal illness, or maybe tonsils or chicken pox, since they both happened in that age range, too. I just remember being disappointed I couldn't go, and despite loving everything space back in third grade (thanks to the best long term sub ever while my teacher was out with tuberculosis) and always having an affinity for constellations and the like, I've never made it to one. But this was my chance! I messaged his teacher to ask about chaperoning, and (probably after hearing my story, both from me and from Carter) I was lucky enough to be selected as one of the three for the class. It definitely perked up my Friday morning! Of course, after some snow to complicate the day on Thursday, it was once again snowing on Friday.
I arrived a few minutes before the kids, so I wandered around checking out some of the lobby exhibits, including a secret space camera that was used to spy on Russia back during the Cold War. This directional marker on the floor has the year the planetarium opened, in possibly the most 60s font ever.
This Paley sculpture of Halley's Comet has a time capsule in the head that will be opened up in 2061, the next time the comet passes. I only vaguely remember the last passing, and it's crazy to think I might not make it to the next to hear what's in that capsule!
It was fun to see Carter's face when he saw me there upon his arrival. I'll admit being in a place with nearly 100 first graders was a bit of an assault on the senses, but it was fun to get to sit with him and experience this together for the first time!
Other than things I've seen in scenes from The Big Bang Theory and Friends involving planetariums, I wasn't sure what to expect. And even still, this one ended up being totally different than I expected! All of the seats were on the same level (and they were like nice, reclining lawn chairs rather than theater-style seats) and set up in a full circle. The dome screen had a tree image when we got in there...
...and Carter made himself right at home!
Before the show started, they pointed out the planetarium's old projector, which has a home in the middle of the room. It lowers into the floor as the show starts!
It was hard to get good pictures of the show, but I tried, just for fun...
It was a really cool show, and it was pretty amazing to hear Carter say what certain things were before the announcer did. He knew which planet was Neptune because it was blue, and he knew that an odd shaped rocky thing was one of Mars' moons. He clearly has been listening in class, and I can't wait until we get a clear night so we can look for Venus and a few constellations!
It was a short but fun show, and before we knew it, the kids were hopping back on the bus. As I headed back to the lobby, I noticed a little tunnel exhibit off to the side and ventured into there. It had video and 3D style images of various space bodies like planets and galaxies and quasars. It was definitely a bit of a throwback to museum exhibits of the 80s, but the earth looked pretty cool from deeper inside.
There was also a large spherical moon (?) hanging outside the tunnel.
I very much liked this stained glass style art back out toward the lobby.
I wish it could have lasted longer, but it was so much fun to experience this with Carter. I would love to go back with all of us, though I doubt this is really Jacob's thing. I really shouldn't have waited 35+ years to get to one, though!
Onward to another week, but at least it's a shorter one! Craig is also home this weekend, which is always helpful, as well. But how are we almost through this month already?
On Saturday the boys and I were up pretty early to drive to Buffalo for my cousin's bridal shower at noon. That wouldn't have been a big deal except that Craig was working and it was snowing. A lot. The roads actually ended up being okay for most of the way, just getting a bit messy off the Thruway. The shower was great--what more can you ask for than good family time, catered Olive Garden, and a chocolate fountain? It's amazing to think my youngest cousin is a couple months away from getting married! Thankfully the boys were good for Grandpa, and we had a little time at my parents' after the shower to relax. My mom and I worked on the challenging 2,000-piece puzzle she has been chipping away at, which made my dad marvel since he hasn't completed a piece yet! Even Jacob managed to put together some pieces outside the main puzzle that can be moved in when more of it is together. But just as we were getting in a groove, it started snowing harder, so we got on the road. It was a pretty exhausting drive. I was able to go about 45 mph most of the way, but lane changes were harrowing and it just felt slow. It was about two hours, though that included a short stop, but still considerably longer than the usual 1:20. We finished off the night with a three-person shoveling effort to clear about four inches out of the driveway. It was starting to rain a little (but it would turn back into snow), so I wanted to clear it out before it got any heavier. The boys did a great job!
On Sunday Craig was on the road, and of course Jacob had two basketball games 35 minutes away. At least they weren't at 8am this time. His team once again struggled. One game was at least a little close, but the other was pretty rough. Jacob scored four points in the first game and should have had a fifth except that his foul shot bounced off the rim, supposedly hit a cable above the hoop, and dropped through the net, but didn't count due to the cable interference. I felt like in a game like this, for kids, if it goes in, it should count. It's not his fault it bounced crazy, but even without the cable it most likely would have gone in. But anyway...in game two Jacob got injured early. Someone stuck out their leg on a screen, and when Jacob ran into it, it somehow twisted his leg and pulled something in his hip. He sat out for a while and finally made it back in during the second half. He scored one basket and played well, but he was sore afterward. He seems better today. The rest of Sunday ended up pretty lazy, though it was much needed.
Craig came home around lunch time today, and another lazy afternoon was in order for all. Before he arrived home, Carter finished up his big project from the last week or so. Because I flaked and decided I didn't trust the Five Below rock tumbler that he got for Christmas and didn't want to commit to the lengthy process, I got him a replacement gift that also incorporates the "jewels" he likes so much: a dig kit. It was a giant block that had 15 cool rocks hidden inside it. He started working on it last week, and in the picture below you can see a little patch of bright blue by his hand, which was the first one he found.
He got out a couple, but lost a little steam when he couldn't find any more. I chiseled away at it over the course of the week to find areas where he could keep digging, and over the last few days we managed to find the rest!
 |
| His favorite is the geode (the larger gray one on the left), but there were some cool crystals, some fool's gold, and a bunch of pretty, smooth stones |
Another highlight of the week was Carter's first night of basketball. We now have both boys practicing on Thursdays about an hour apart, so those will be busy nights for the next couple months. Carter did pretty well at his practice. He could use to be a better listener when the coach gives drill instructions, but he scored one nice basket and particularly loved running sprints! His first game is next Saturday, and while it will be a very different version of basketball than we're used to with Jacob, it will be interesting to see how he does.
The highlight of the week was Carter's field trip! A couple weeks ago his teacher sent a message about an upcoming field trip to the planetarium. I got very excited because I have never been to the planetarium. As I recall (and I don't think my childhood mind just made this up), when I was approximately Carter's age or a little younger, my class was supposed to go to the planetarium. I missed it due to illness, though I'm not sure if it was a normal illness, or maybe tonsils or chicken pox, since they both happened in that age range, too. I just remember being disappointed I couldn't go, and despite loving everything space back in third grade (thanks to the best long term sub ever while my teacher was out with tuberculosis) and always having an affinity for constellations and the like, I've never made it to one. But this was my chance! I messaged his teacher to ask about chaperoning, and (probably after hearing my story, both from me and from Carter) I was lucky enough to be selected as one of the three for the class. It definitely perked up my Friday morning! Of course, after some snow to complicate the day on Thursday, it was once again snowing on Friday.
 |
| At least I came out to sun later! Too bad it was still only about 15 degrees! |
I arrived a few minutes before the kids, so I wandered around checking out some of the lobby exhibits, including a secret space camera that was used to spy on Russia back during the Cold War. This directional marker on the floor has the year the planetarium opened, in possibly the most 60s font ever.
This Paley sculpture of Halley's Comet has a time capsule in the head that will be opened up in 2061, the next time the comet passes. I only vaguely remember the last passing, and it's crazy to think I might not make it to the next to hear what's in that capsule!
It was fun to see Carter's face when he saw me there upon his arrival. I'll admit being in a place with nearly 100 first graders was a bit of an assault on the senses, but it was fun to get to sit with him and experience this together for the first time!
Other than things I've seen in scenes from The Big Bang Theory and Friends involving planetariums, I wasn't sure what to expect. And even still, this one ended up being totally different than I expected! All of the seats were on the same level (and they were like nice, reclining lawn chairs rather than theater-style seats) and set up in a full circle. The dome screen had a tree image when we got in there...
...and Carter made himself right at home!
Before the show started, they pointed out the planetarium's old projector, which has a home in the middle of the room. It lowers into the floor as the show starts!
It was hard to get good pictures of the show, but I tried, just for fun...
 |
| The Sun |
 |
| The orbits |
 |
| Saturn! |
It was a short but fun show, and before we knew it, the kids were hopping back on the bus. As I headed back to the lobby, I noticed a little tunnel exhibit off to the side and ventured into there. It had video and 3D style images of various space bodies like planets and galaxies and quasars. It was definitely a bit of a throwback to museum exhibits of the 80s, but the earth looked pretty cool from deeper inside.
There was also a large spherical moon (?) hanging outside the tunnel.
I very much liked this stained glass style art back out toward the lobby.
I wish it could have lasted longer, but it was so much fun to experience this with Carter. I would love to go back with all of us, though I doubt this is really Jacob's thing. I really shouldn't have waited 35+ years to get to one, though!
Onward to another week, but at least it's a shorter one! Craig is also home this weekend, which is always helpful, as well. But how are we almost through this month already?
Saturday, January 11, 2020
Random Ramblings of an Overtired Mom
The lack of posts this week pretty much indicates what you would think it does--the week was simultaneously super busy and quite boring. Craig came down with a cold, which left me mostly on duty for the evening activities--two basketball practices and one confirmation/bible study night. Then Craig left on the road Friday so it's been a couple days of keeping the boys from killing each other while also de-Christmasing the house. To make matters worse, instead of Jacob's usual Sunday basketball games, which Craig would have been back for, we ended up with two games on Saturday, starting at 8am. That meant I'd have to get both kids out of the house by myself, earlier than Jacob and I usually get out on a regular day, which is hard enough. Ugh. All I wanted for Saturday was to sleep in and recover from getting back to the grind this week. But I guess that was too much to ask, and Craig was also disappointed to miss games. Knowing the weekend was going to be a little weird with the early games, I was extra determined to get a strong start on de-Christmasing. I did manage to take down both Christmas trees on Friday evening, which was impressive. Of course, that meant very little sleep heading into a very early morning. We did get out of the house close to on time with minimal yelling, so I guess we'll call it a win.
Oh, and might I add that when I took a moment to vent about the early morning on Facebook on Friday, I got the usual "Oh, you'll miss this someday" comments, and it made me pretty crazy, actually. Sure, there are parts of my kids' childhood that I will miss, but I will not miss lack of sleep, nor will I miss dragging my kids out of bed and screaming at them to get out the door. I am a much happier basketball watcher while rested and with a happy miniature co-watcher. I know they mean well, but let's face it--most of us don't miss the actual stuff, but the "idea" of the stuff, the good stuff we blissfully remember over the crap our brains mercifully filter out. Hence why our immensely challenging Disney trip when Jacob was five and diagnosed with Celiac on day two still has pleasant memories associated with it. So lay off--I will totally miss basketball, just not at 8am on a Saturday.
Anyway, Jacob's team's rough spell has continued (four straight losses), and we're not sure what's going so wrong suddenly. He actually had two great games today despite his team getting doubled up in both. He scored 12 points total. After some tough love from the coach to the team, the coach pulled us aside to let Jacob know that it wasn't directed at him--he's a great player and he's very pleased with him. It's just unfortunate that the rest of his teammates aren't listening. I was proud of Jacob--not just his play today, but being a very coachable player. It's amazing what he can do when he puts his mind to it.
Today I took down the rest of the decorations and move the furniture back into place. The only thing left to do is bring up the new toy table (my old TV stand, since our coffee table is back on coffee table duty). I lost momentum this evening because it has become quite apparent that I'm getting Craig's cold (Carter seems to have it, as well). We did have to run out and grab 100 pounds of sand tonight, as winds are coming overnight and we didn't know that until after Craig had gone to Toronto. So, instead of putting it away like we often do when gusty winds are coming, we had to opt for some extra weight and some prayer. We shall see. Oh, and did I mention that today I managed to gash up my forehead with a car door again, for the second time in about two months? Impressive, no? Only this time it was my own familiar car door and I can only blame distraction by arguing kids. Two small punctures and a scrape this time. The other one did scar so I'm guessing this one will too. What is wrong with me?! Is this the start of old age? I was also sore after de-decorating, so maybe it is.
Carter starts basketball on Thursday, so our Thursdays will be extra jammed up for the next few months, and Saturdays could get complicated. I guess we'll make it work. But if week one back to the grind is any indication, it could be a bit daunting. Well, at least we just have to get through one more week of work/school before we get a four-day week. That's something, right? We're fine. Everything's fine.
Anyway, I guess I can take solace in my much calmer, less busily decorated house. Haha. Happy weekend!
Oh, and might I add that when I took a moment to vent about the early morning on Facebook on Friday, I got the usual "Oh, you'll miss this someday" comments, and it made me pretty crazy, actually. Sure, there are parts of my kids' childhood that I will miss, but I will not miss lack of sleep, nor will I miss dragging my kids out of bed and screaming at them to get out the door. I am a much happier basketball watcher while rested and with a happy miniature co-watcher. I know they mean well, but let's face it--most of us don't miss the actual stuff, but the "idea" of the stuff, the good stuff we blissfully remember over the crap our brains mercifully filter out. Hence why our immensely challenging Disney trip when Jacob was five and diagnosed with Celiac on day two still has pleasant memories associated with it. So lay off--I will totally miss basketball, just not at 8am on a Saturday.
Anyway, Jacob's team's rough spell has continued (four straight losses), and we're not sure what's going so wrong suddenly. He actually had two great games today despite his team getting doubled up in both. He scored 12 points total. After some tough love from the coach to the team, the coach pulled us aside to let Jacob know that it wasn't directed at him--he's a great player and he's very pleased with him. It's just unfortunate that the rest of his teammates aren't listening. I was proud of Jacob--not just his play today, but being a very coachable player. It's amazing what he can do when he puts his mind to it.
Today I took down the rest of the decorations and move the furniture back into place. The only thing left to do is bring up the new toy table (my old TV stand, since our coffee table is back on coffee table duty). I lost momentum this evening because it has become quite apparent that I'm getting Craig's cold (Carter seems to have it, as well). We did have to run out and grab 100 pounds of sand tonight, as winds are coming overnight and we didn't know that until after Craig had gone to Toronto. So, instead of putting it away like we often do when gusty winds are coming, we had to opt for some extra weight and some prayer. We shall see. Oh, and did I mention that today I managed to gash up my forehead with a car door again, for the second time in about two months? Impressive, no? Only this time it was my own familiar car door and I can only blame distraction by arguing kids. Two small punctures and a scrape this time. The other one did scar so I'm guessing this one will too. What is wrong with me?! Is this the start of old age? I was also sore after de-decorating, so maybe it is.
Carter starts basketball on Thursday, so our Thursdays will be extra jammed up for the next few months, and Saturdays could get complicated. I guess we'll make it work. But if week one back to the grind is any indication, it could be a bit daunting. Well, at least we just have to get through one more week of work/school before we get a four-day week. That's something, right? We're fine. Everything's fine.
Anyway, I guess I can take solace in my much calmer, less busily decorated house. Haha. Happy weekend!
Saturday, January 4, 2020
New Year, Same Old
Seems like I do a version of this post every year. The calendar flips, but not much changes. The kids are still fighting like crazy, the house is a mess, I'm dreading Monday, and the Bills are blowing another game (a playoff one, this time, but still). Even still, I guess all things considered it's been a good two weeks. We had a great Christmas, we had some quality extended family time, toys have actually been played with, and we even snuck in a movie and some Glow Golf. But forgive me for a being a bit bummed about the other stuff above.
The kid battles have been brutal. The boys literally will not stay away from each other and it never ends well. Jacob is constantly picking on Carter, and Carter is constantly fighting back in some sort of physical or verbal way that infuriates Jacob even worse. It's a terrible cycle, and neither will give in or even admit that they're part of the problem. I honestly don't think it will get any better until we start family therapy, and maybe someone else telling them that might help get through to them. Jacob thinks he's just joking around, but Carter never takes it that way. I think it's a combination of being too young to fully grasp sarcasm and tiring of the constant barrage of shots Jacob takes at him. He's just over it and it would not be funny to him under any circumstances. I tried to explain it to Jacob that if a guy in the office makes seemingly innocent but still uncomfortable comments to a woman (saying she's pretty or expressing interest), if the woman finds it uncomfortable, it automatically becomes something that should not be said. So, if Carter is taking his comments as offensive, then he needs to stop. Maybe Carter is overreacting a little, but it happens constantly and at this point it's like a PTSD reaction. It's awful, but Jacob can't help himself, especially in the morning before he takes his medicine, which regulates his decision making a little. I'm tired of yelling, and so is Craig, but letting them work it out themselves doesn't work either. Someone gets hurt or comes whining to us about being wronged and we don't know who started it so it's hard to punish both over and over again. We're just over it but there's no end in sight right now.
In other news, it wouldn't be a Christmas break without another reorganization effort. I went through and scooped up a few toys to try to sell, but there are still more around that I know could probably go. Hopefully soon. Additionally, Carter mentioned to me a few weeks back that he wanted to get rid of the table in his room. He rarely sat at the table, but instead it became a catch-all for all sorts of stuff--there were army guys camped out underneath and piles of trinkets and books on top. It was a mess and admittedly made me a little anxious to even look at. His room is small, so the idea of taking out the table wasn't awful, and over the last couple weeks it grew on me. I realized that if we replaced it with a shelf we could move overflow books out from a crate they were shelved on, which would release even more floor space, and toy overflow could probably fit on the shelf, too. It did mean it was time to pack up the Mega Bloks in a storage bin since they lived in a fabric bin underneath (they're now in the crawl space but still accessible if we desperately needed them), but it felt good to clear everything out and see a nice open space. I moved the table to the basement, where it's now holding the Lego tabletop my mom had given us to use with it years ago. It takes up no more space than the tabletop did sitting on the floor, so that's nice. Carter even sat at it longer tonight than I think he ever did when it was in his room.
I bought a bookshelf with Walmart's next day delivery, but when it showed up it was actually a bit smaller than I thought (I guess I didn't look closely at the dimensions--I thought it was similar to one I got Jacob last year), and the color was different than I expected. At that point my plan started changing. I decided I could move our office bookshelf (also a three-shelf, which I've had since I moved out on my own) to Carter's room since the wood matched better, and use the new one in the office. The books definitely didn't fit as well on the new one, but it turned out fine. My old one was actually narrower (so not as good for kid books), but it definitely had a lot of room and fit the space even better than the other one. So it all worked out just fine in the end, and Carter has much more floor space.
Next up (if I can get Craig to work on it tomorrow) is organizing Carter's Legos, which are all over the place. Bits and pieces are in his room and all over the living room toy area, and many haven't been touched in ages, so they're starting to get on my nerves. If we can get those under control, that will help things feel a bit less messy. Next weekend I'll take down the Christmas stuff, at which point I will bring up my old TV stand (also an original to my first apartment), which will replace our old coffee table (which is now once again our coffee table) as the toy table in the living room. Adding to the urgency to rethink the toy situation was that Jacob actually gave Carter all of his old Playmobil stuff, which had been taking up space in his closet, and I think the two castle towers will fit nicely in the "speaker" sections of the TV stand. More can go up top, and little bins should fit in the DVD/VCR/cable box spots. Once that's set up, we can reconsider what else should move around. Carter has some extra space in his closet and on his new shelves now, too, but we'll see. At least it makes me feel like I have a project that makes progress.
I feel like I got around to most of the pesky projects I needed to do while I was home. The house itself needs a cleaning, but that's not happening during this break. We have church and two basketball games tomorrow, so time is limited and I'm definitely not spending it doing that. I'm seriously dreading Monday morning, with getting back to early wake-ups and lunch packing. Carter has been routinely sleeping until after 10 lately (!), so his 7:30 wakeups will be challenging, even if we do manage to get back to a normal bedtime. Jacob is dreading getting back to school, too, so I'm sure he'll be lovely in the morning. I have a hellish January waiting for me at work, with lots of projects that need to be done ASAP--two rounds of sending out thank you gifts, one major mailing for multiple units, and one smaller mailing, just to name a few things. It's good to be busy, but maybe not like that. It might make the month go quicker, though, which is always a good thing in January. And before we know it, Carter's birthday will be here! And yes, I'm already scouting gifts for him--though hopefully light on the toy side since we seem to have plenty of those. I can start planning his party (and cake) pretty soon, too. Anything to make winter go faster.
Speaking of which, Jacob gets back to basketball tomorrow, and Carter starts practice next week for his Upward team. That should be interesting since he's very competitive but hates to lose. Let's hope he learns some sportsmanship...quickly. Those games could be a little painful, however, with 6 and 7-year-olds still trying to master dribbling, let alone shooting. We're also a bit spoiled after watching Jacob's team play, so this might feel sllloooowww. We will definitely get our fill of basketball over the next couple months with both boys playing, and then transition right into Jacob's travel season.
Between the holiday, time with my family, and three half days of work, we haven't really had sustained down time with many full days at home. Added to the mix yesterday was that Jacob's annual brain study, which was a full day. We got there at 10am and didn't leave until nearly 5pm. The highlight was our Chipotle lunch, but filling out surveys for a couple hours, and then spending two more hours reviewing more than 300 emails (mostly gift notifications, which is a good thing) was exhausting. It's two hours less that I'll have to spend doing it Monday, but still--it was rough. However, I can tell that I've rested up pretty appropriately over this break, though I'm still not at the point where I'm looking forward to Monday's structure. It takes a lot to get me to that point, though. This time of year I tend to have flashbacks to my unemployment and my maternity leave, which were both during cold, snowy winters and represent the only extended periods of time that I've had at home in this house. I crave that kind of down time, even though each of those experiences had stresses and busyness of their own. I guess I just do better with some structure, but not a lot? But I can tell that I'm feeling better--I even managed to get on the elliptical twice in three days, which hasn't happened in ages. Let's hope I can keep that up. I have a lot of catching up to do on the fitness front after two months of sickness and a month of Christmas eating. But after not taking extended vacation over the summer, I'm pretty sure I was overdue for a true break, and this fit the bill despite its interruptions.
So, the Bills' season is over (OT loss) and so are the holidays, and real life reality is coming quickly. Not exactly the best feeling on this Saturday night, but better to have it still be Saturday than Sunday! I know we need to get back in the groove, for many reasons, and I'm thankful for the time we've had...but I'm still not ready.
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